Note: This was one of the first stories I've ever written. I actually wrote this back in middle school. Because it's one of my earliest works, this honestly isn't one of my best. Still, it holds a special place in my heart, so I wanted to share it with all of you. I hope that you enjoy. Thank you for reading. <3
I couldn't believe this was happening. There was no way this could really be happening. I had to be imagining this! Paulie was dead.
Caleb, Nicole, Matt, Buddy, and I were standing in the hospital room, looking down in horror at our friend who had just flatlined. This isn't happening. This isn't happening. This isn't happening. We all knew this was a possibility, but we never thought it would get this bad.
Four years ago when we formed our dance crew, Sonic Illusions, we were in sixth grade. Paulie, Caleb, Nicole, Buddy, Matt, and I had been in hip-hop class together since we were five, and in sixth grade we finally decided to make an official crew. We were best friends, and being in a crew together just strengthened our bond. I had to be dreaming. I had to be dreaming. For the next three and a half years Sonic Illusions was unstoppable. We had won over fifty competitions, had two national titles, and over a million subscribers on YouTube. But that all changed our freshman year of high school.
The nurses and doctors were pushing us out the door of the room. Buddy was screaming "Get your hands off of us! We have the right to see him!"
This isn't happening. This isn't happening.
"Only family can see him right now." The doctor said calmly.
"We are his family!" Buddy screamed.
Nicole and Caleb had to hold Buddy back from tackling the doctor. I just stood there completely frozen. Buddy's words rung in my ears. "We are his family." It was true. We weren't just a crew. We weren't just friends. We were family. My knees felt weak. I collapsed on the ground, and started sobbing. I couldn't help it. I couldn't hold it in. It was all too much for me.
Someone wrapped their arms around me, and whispered "It's okay Lily, it's going to be okay."
It was Matt ."Paulie..." I cried.
"I know" Matt said "I know".
Everyone in the crew knew I had a huge crush on Paulie. Everyone except Paulie, of course. I started liking him in sixth grade, and I've liked him ever since. I spent years trying to get him to like me back, and trying to get him to ask me on a date, but it never happened.
The rest of the crew reacted to my crush on Paulie in very different ways. Nicole thought we'd be cute together, and tried to make us a couple. Caleb and Buddy liked to tease me about it. And Matt never said much about it.
Paulie's funeral was just a few days later. Not many people showed up to the mass. Just Paulie's parents, grandparents, and and the crew. Tears slid down my face as the mass went on. This isn't happening. Matt sat next to me during the mass, and slipped his hand into mine. I felt better. I tried to pay attention during the mass, but my mind kept wandering back to that one day. That one day when everything went wrong.
That day our freshman year Paulie was late to dance rehearsal...really late. When he finally arrived at rehearsal he had a solemn look on his face, and he wouldn't look anyone in the eyes. He said he had something important to tell us. My heart immediately sunk to my stomach. He told us a lot, but I only heard one word: cancer.
I didn't leave my house for a week after Paulie's funeral. I couldn't. If I did then it would be real. Paulie would really be gone. I'd really have to go to school without him there. I'd really have to go to dance rehearsal without him. I'd really have to go on without him. Sonic Illusions would really have to go on without him. Everyone told me I'd have to move on eventually, but I didn't listen. I didn't want it to be real.
One night I was sitting on the couch watching TV when there was a knock at the door. I got up and answered it. It was Matt.
"Hey Lily" he said.
"Hey" I said "so let me guess: you're here to tell me to get off of the couch, go back to school, move on."
"Nope" he said "I'm just here to make to feel better."
I was taken aback. "Really?" I asked.
"You just lost your friend, crewmate, and the only boy you ever liked" he said "I want to help you heal."
I had tears in my eyes. Someone was finally willing to help me get through this. All I could was hug him. "Thank you" I whispered.
Paulie went through treatment for about a year after the cancer was found. Everything changed after that. He was hardly at school anymore, he was barely in any more YouTube videos, and he couldn't dance anymore. Despite this, we still went to visit him every single day. He was still a member of Sonic Illusions, whether he was dancing or not. Then one night we got a call from Paulie's parents. He was in the hospital. He was dying.
Caleb drove us to the hospital. Paulie's parents met us in the lobby and led us to his room. Then it was just us. Friends. Sonic Illusions. Family.
We all got to say our goodbyes to Paulie. I got to hug him one last time. I wanted to tell him how I really felt about him. How I've liked him all these years, but I didn't. All I said to him was that I'd see him again one day. I hardly remember the last thing I said to him, but I'll always remember the last thing he said to me: "Matt has been in love with you since he was five. You should give him a chance."
That was ten years ago. Now the five of us are here. Caleb, Nicole, Buddy, Matt and I. Everything was perfect. The church, my dress, everything. Buddy walked me down the aisle to give me away. Nicole, Caleb, and Matt were at the altar. Besides the priest it was only the five of us in the church. Nicole was my maid of honor, and Caleb was Matt's best man. Tears of happiness were rolling down my face. I was smiling from ear to ear. This is happening. This is happening. Matt and I held hands when I got to the altar.
"Hi" I said.
"Hi" he replied "You look beautiful."
"Thanks" I said "You look really handsome."
"Thanks" he said "I wish Paulie was here."
"He is" I said "I can feel it."
Nothing was the same after Paulie died. It was just the five of us. Everything was different. Our YouTube channel, our dance rehearsals, our conversations at lunch, everything. There was a void in our family now, and nothing was ever going to fill it. We all knew that. But not every change after Paulie's death was bad. Something happened between Matt and I. We fell in love.
After the wedding ceremony the five of us went to the cemetery. It was easy to find the spot since we've been there so many times before. Paulie's tombstone. We all stood around the piece of stone. With my arm linked with Matt's I laid my bouquet in front of Paulie's tomb. We had to include Paulie in our special day. We knew this is what he wanted. Not just for Matt and I to have our happily ever after, but for all of us to have our happily ever afters.
Plus, he was still with us. He was still a crewmate no matter what. He was still a Sonic Illusion. Still a friend. Still Family.
