The Engineer (Bucky Barnes x OC)

Chapter 21- Bucky's POV

Bucky's POV

Pain.

That's what Bucky Barnes awoke to.

Sharp pain in his side and a throbbing sensation in his head.

"...wha..?"

He clutched his forehead as he sat up, feeling as though he were hungover or something, except much worse.

He glanced down at Nico, who was fast asleep.

This should've been a soothing sight for him, but no, something was wrong.

Something was very, very wrong.

Nico had a metal sleeve on his left arm, much like Bucky's old one. He was thrown from his blanket and his head was far from his pillow.

Bucky carefully made his way over to the young man. His face was pale, and he was no longer whimpering.

Bucky's eyes fell down to Nico's neck.

He nearly gasped.

Bright red marks curled around Nico's throat.

No.

Bucky prayed to himself, scrambling over to Nico and examining him further, pressing his ear to the engineer's chest and listening for a heartbeat.

Please don't be dead, please don't be dead... he pleaded in his head.

Thump.

Thump.

Thump.

He's alive. Bucky realized, and sighed in relief, removing his ear from Nico's chest and laying down beside him.

"What did I do to you?" he asked softly, patting Nico's arm. "What did I do to you, Nico?"

Nico did not stir.

"I choked you again," Bucky acknowledged. "And that's my fault. I didn't take your pills. I had another nightmare. I think you did, too..."

Bucky's fingers trailed over Nico's stomach and chest.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm sorry for choking you again, I'm sorry for not doing what you told me to, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything."

Nico wasn't conscious to tell him that it was okay or that he forgave him.

He probably didn't.

"I should've listened to you," Bucky admitted. "I was stupid for not doing so."

A pause emitted from his voicebox, and he quickly placed two of his fingers on Nico's neck, taking his pulse.

Still alive.

Bucky buried his head in Nico's chest, praying for him to wake soon.

~

One hour later

Nico wasn't awake.

Bucky had laid there for a full hour, begging him to wake up. He didn't know how to call Shuri or the guards, and he didn't know if Nico needed any medical attention. All he could say was that Nico was still alive somehow and that he wouldn't wake up, no matter what he did.

Bucky considered pouring the lake water on his face but then realized that doing that would just be rude. He also considered kissing him awake, but he wasn't sure if Nico even wanted to kiss him anymore.

Bucky's mind started to drift around, finally settling on thinking about Steve Rogers, his very first best friend.

His only best friend.

He vaguely started to wonder what Steve would think about him and Nico. He'd never told anyone about his orientation, not even tiny Steve, and he would trust Steve with his life.

As they'd said- he was with him 'till the end of the line.

Steve had started a fight over him. Steve cared about him more than he'd ever know, and Bucky felt terribly guilty having never told Steve about his orientation.

The dude deserved to know.

Steve, being the trusting man he was, had always told him everything.

The memories had started to come back ever since he'd seen him again. He remembered bits and pieces, and soon, things started to make sense.

His weird urge to check in alleyways as he walked down the street, even though he had no idea what he was looking for. Turns out, Steve used to be tiny, and he'd get beat up in the alleyways by bullies.

He would scream for a "Steve" while being tortured but never knew who this strange "Steve" was. Well, that one was self-explanatory: he was best friends with him.

He was always drawn to Captain America, though he never understood why he always wanted to know more about him. Again, self-explanatory: Captain America was his best friend.

Slowly, things were starting to make sense.

He would remember random things at random times. There was one time when he was going to buy food, and suddenly, the name "Sarah" popped into his head, and somehow he knew- that's Steve's mom.

But who was Steve?

He hadn't known at the time.

Or another time, when he saw an American flag hanging over someone's porch. He'd smirked to himself and thought, "star-spangled man with a plan" before doing a double-take and wondering just what the heck a "star-spangled man with a plan" was or where he'd heard it.

Once, he saw a date. The year he was born- 1917- and just somehow known that it was his birth year.

If he saw Steve again, he'd tell him.

He promised himself.