All I Want (Remus Lupin/reader)

chapter eight

 You were slightly taken aback by Lupin's words. Unfortunately you didn't have time to think about it because you were interrupted by a silvery stag charging through the door of the tent. It was Harry's Patronus.

Even if you weren't aware of that fact, you would have been when it spoke, "Y/N, Ron has left us. He's fine, he's just being a git. We aren't doing anything right now and might not be for a while. We've made some headway but we are at a standstill right now. I just wanted to inform you. I will contact you again if we need you. Stay safe."

And just like that it disappeared. Ron left them? He knows how important this is. They must have got something done though. Did they find one of the Horcruxes? Have they destroyed anymore?

Your thoughts were interrupted by Remus, "Well at least they're all right and you don't have to go anywhere." There he goes again. Could he not understand how important the mission was to you? Or why you wanted to be there? You could avenge your parents. You could make the world into the one they wanted to see.

You huffed and turned your back on Remus. He didn't say anything but you could feel him looking at you. You could hear the covers ruffling and turned around to see Remus sitting on the floor next to you. It had slightly startled you and you'd leaned away from him in the process.

"I'm sorry Y/N."

"For what?"

"I know the mission is important to you. You don't think I know that."

"Because you don't act like you know how important it is."

"Your safety is my number one priority. And I was not lying when I said I care about you. I don't want to see you get hurt."

You felt your walls crumble a bit. He cared about you. But ridding the world of Voldemort was worth dying for. Making the wizarding world safe and fair is what your parents wanted. And so do you.

"I think my death is a small price to pay to see You-Know-Who gone."

"That's very noble but your death is a price I'm not willing to pay."

Slowly but surely, your wall was breaking. Why did he care so much? You couldn't help but think that he didn't want you to die because he would feel guilty. People would blame him because he was supposed to watch you. Or does he like you? That was impossible. You were his student. Nothing more. But you couldn't help but feel your body heat up at the thought of being something more.

"I-" you sighed. "If it makes you feel better, I'll try not to put myself in harm's way. But if Harry and Hermione need me, I'm going to help them."

He nodded, "I wouldn't expect anything less." He paused and seemed to think for a moment before resuming, "I can tell why you were put in Slytherin. You are extremely stubborn and determined." And despite the tense atmosphere, he laughed. Of course you laughed too.

He patted your shoulder and told you goodnight. It was hard to stay mad at Remus. He had a very calming aura about him that made you want to listen to whatever he said. Or maybe it was just you.

It was a few days later when Remus had informed you he would be leaving because of the full moon. The night had passed and he didn't return in the morning like normal. It didn't strike you as strange. Maybe this moon was harder on him. By the time it was dark outside he still hadn't returned. You went to sleep expecting he would return anytime soon.

You were awoken by a loud CLANG coming from the other side of the room. The tent was pitch black other than a small lantern that sat on the bedside table. After your eyes had adjusted to the darkness you saw Remus clutching his side and leaning against the counter. You hurriedly got up and made your way over. He was breathing heavily and didn't look at you when you approached.

There was blood coming from in between his fingers. "Remus! What happened? Are you okay?" you rushed. He looked over at you and you noticed how sick he looked. He didn't speak but you could tell something was obviously wrong. You leaned into the side that wasn't hurt and aided him towards the bed. He nearly collapsed as soon as you let go of him.

Now that he was laying down you pulled up the fabric of his shirt and examined his injury. He had a severe gash across his ribs and a bruise on his chest. You had helped out in the medical wing during your time at Hogwarts and had some experience with injuries. It took you a while but you were able to clean the cut and seal it. It would take some time to heal and would probably leave a scar but you noticed Lupin already had multiple littered across his torso.

He began to breathe easier so you took that as a good sign. It seemed like he was going to say something but you didn't want to push him too much.

"Thank," he winced from trying to sit up, "you." You slowly lowered him back onto the bed, not allowing him to get up. "You're welcome. You need to lay down for a while though." You pulled his shirt back down, fingers lightly grazing over his skin. "Do you remember what happened?"

He shook his head. "No. I believe it was an animal though."

"It's pretty rough. It would have been a big animal," you said. He let out a breath of air and nodded again. You were about to get up when Remus grabbed your hand. "Thank you."

He had already said it once but you said, "You're welcome," once again. He didn't let go of your hand and it didn't seem like he was going to. He continued to hold onto it so you decided to scoot over, sitting next to him, back against the headboard. He closed his eyes and layed there, not saying anything. After a few minutes you were consumed by sleep, finally realizing how tired you were.

When you woke up Remus was still lying next to you, hand in yours. You didn't want to disturb him so you grabbed a book from the bedside table and read quietly. Less than ten minutes later he stirred, taking in a deep breath and opening his eyes. He gazed at you and then moved the hand that wasn't in yours to his ribs. "You'll be okay. It just needs time to heal."

"I don't imagine you'll let me out of bed and make breakfast?" he joked. "No, I'm making breakfast. And lunch and dinner. You need to rest." When you stood up, your hand slipped out of his. After holding onto his warm hand for hours, it felt odd not to. You fixed him breakfast and lunch as promised, letting him sit up and leave the bed only to use the bathroom. By dinner he had gained most of his energy back and said he felt much better. Although you were skeptical, you let him get out of bed and sit in a chair.

Noticing he was still wearing the shirt from last night, which was covered in blood, you skimmed through his clothing and picked out a sweater. You handed it to him and turned around, waiting for him to put it on but you didn't hear any movement. "I can't raise my arms up. I hate to ask you this, but could you help me?"

When you faced him he was looking at the floor in front of you, not meeting your eyes. You walked towards him and leaned down, gently pulling up the hem of his shirt. He avoided looking at your face and instead turned his head away from yours. His face had turned a light shade of red and you could feel the heat in yours. He pulled his arms through the holes and you lifted the shirt above his head, leaving him topless.

You had seen his torso last night but at the moment you were too busy trying to fix his wounds. He had scars all over his chest, ribs, and stomach. He was lean too. Apparently you had been staring because Remus looked you in the eye and raised his eyebrows. You gulped and went back to putting a new sweater on him. Every time your fingers touched his skin it felt like electric shocks going through your body. You finished helping him and he told you a quiet "Thank you."

You took his blood-stained shirt and tossed it into the pile of clothes that needed to be washed. That, however, was a job for later.

AUTHOR'S NOTE 

Well, that was a lot of emotions. What do you guys think? How are you liking it? I enjoyed making this chapter ( I wonder why??) As always, if anything needs correcting or you want to suggest something just comment it! Love you guys!