burn in hell- jc skins

Ep 1

I open my eyes to the sun piercing through the open blinds on my window. It's warm, which is unusual for England.
It's my first day of college today, so I actually made an effort with my outfit. As soon as i tie my laces, my mums voice travels up the stairs.

"Eleanor your going to be late sweetheart!" She screams up to me.
"I know, I know! Give me a second." I stated
I tumble downstairs with my backpack and spliff in hand.

"Bye mum! I love you" I shout as I close the door.

                    ——————

As I'm strolling down the Bristol streets i light my spliff, and enjoy the warmth of the morning. I pull out my phone and call Effy to make sure she's actually coming in today. It rings for ages until it eventually goes to voicemail. I decide to leave her one for when she actually picks up her fucking phone.
"Pick up the phone, loser! you better not bail on me today, i'm counting on you"
Just as I finish the message, a boy rides past me on his skateboard. He takes the spliff out of my hand, rides down to a set of table and chairs and sits with two others.

I reach where he sat and pull a chair up next to him.
"You owe me one bucket"
"Bucket?" He questions
I point to his hat and he pulls a face but eventually laughs.
"And who might you be?" The boy in the red shirt demanded
"Elle, and who might you be?" I shoot back.
"Cook, and this is JJ"
"Alright JJ?" I smile at the shy boy.
"Would you like to hear my thoughts on the benefits of Carlsberg as part of a balanced dietary pattern?" He spoke while bouncing in his seat.
"No mate, i don't think she does" bucket interrupts.
"Tell me another time" I whisper to him.
"Cook JJ and..."
"Freddie"
"Well boys it was very nice to meet you but I've got to go now. See ya!"

                 ———————

I met up with Panda outside of the front doors and we waited for Effy. She finally came after waiting for 15 minutes.
"Where the fuck you been Ef?"
"Dad crashed" she mumbled.
"Ef I'm gonna do lots of surf and turf this summer, aren't I elle, tell her elle!"
"Yeah pand, loads" I giggle.

As we're walking in the doors Panda gives me a lolly and we go into the big hall full of students.

                 ———————
All the students are now seated, and chatting loudly.
The doors open and in walk some teachers, one with a megaphone and one with a clipboard.
"Welcome to Roundview College. A meeting place for young people"
"Jesus Christ this is gonna be a shit show" I say a little too loudly. People laugh and some people turn to me, including JJ Freddie and Cook.
A loud whistle blows which shuts everyone up eventually.

"Attention, pay attention, look you!"
"Welcome to Roundview college. We are a designated four star education establishment under the national We're All In It Together Initiative, leading to ultimate improvement status. Anyone who screws that up will be officially burn at the stake."
"And expelled"
"Yes and expelled, god help you all your gonna get some qualifications. Any questions?"

Someone let's a fart rip as she finishes.
"Thank you. Now before I turn you over to your form tutors, I'd like to tell you something about the way in which we organise our..."
Another fart is heard, this time much longer.
"Right very funny, this is a further education collage, not a primary school"
A third fart goes off and the hall breaks out into fits of laughter.
"Stop it, stop it! I'll cut your balls off, you cheeky little turds! You hear me?"
"I do apologise, I think I might be at fault. Too much rhubarb on my Ready Brek. Havoc."
Once again, we all start to laugh.
"Last year, we had some intolerable incidents"
"Think that's about Sid and Tony?" I whisper to Effy.
She just nods her head still looking forward.
"The following will result in instant expulsion,"
As she begins that sentence i get ready to write them down to cross off later. Me and Ef had agreed on it earlier.
"Smoking on the premises, setting fire to the premises, consumption of alcohol on the premises, consumption of drugs on the premises,consumption of pornography on the premises, teacher abuse, glue abuse, self abuse, sexual intercourse with any other student, teacher or animal or combination of the above.
Including oral sex and/or use of sex toys, on the premises."
"Miss Reedy, our new head of communications, is joining us from... where is it your joining us from?" She asked the short blonde woman.
"Erm, I had some time off. Erm seven years. It was stress related but feeling a bit better now, hopefully."

"Form BD1, say your name, please, when I..."
"Put your hand up, p—please when i erm, call your, erm, n—name.

This is basically just copied from the episode lmao.