1:00 pm
"Carlos, why when I came back last night you weren't here?"
"I I I don't know"
"Really? you better not had been out making trouble for yourself. I told you I'm keeping you safe. why cant you believe that Carlos?"
"Cause! mom said the same thing. and as you can see she didn't mean it so I'm assuming you won't either. just leave me alone okay"
I felt a little hurt that he would even BELIEVE I was like my mother. I'm nothing like her and never will be. I walked away without saying another word. carlos is losing it, and sooner or later I'm gonna explode and end up kicking his ass myself.
3:55 pm
I stayed in my room Watching television and scrolling down my instagram timeline. I heard someone walk into my room so I looked up to see Carlos standing there. what did he want?
"What? you came up here to tell me how I'm like are mother? hmm?"
"No, I came to tell you I'm sorry sis. I should've never went off on you like I did. I was waaay out of character. I'm so sorry"
"It's cool just don't do it again cause I was thinking of ways to kick your ass after what you said"
we both laughed a little and just began looking everywhere. I got tired of the silence, like always, so I began to speak.
"Listen Carlos, your to important to me for me to just let you go ahead and get killed. I give you everything you need, EVERYTHING! I love you Alright? nothing will ever harm you again"
I stood up and gave him a hug. I felt him shaking, A LOT. why did he seem so scared? Was he scared that someone might come after him? I don't know but no one will know where we are... no one.
7:00 pm
I got out the shower heading towards my room, but something caught my attention. I heard Carlos in his room saying something. I stepped closer and it went quiet again. I was about to walk away until I heard...
"Man their gonna kill me! I need the money, but from Where? oh my sister nah nah, I can't"
Money? who's killing who?! hell nah I got a feeling he in some deep shit and he lied to me. I busted In forgetting I was in my towel. Carlos jumped up like he just seen a ghost. he walked over to me and I stepped back.
"What the hell are you in here talking about! who's gonna kill you Carlos!?"
"I lied to you okay? that night I came into your home, I actually escaped from a bunch if dudes just beating me up. The head boss told me if I don't bring him his money, I'm dead. I really need that money Carmen, I was hoping you would give it to me but I didn't know how to ask"
"UGHH I could die right now fucking with you Carlos! I knew from the moment you told me that dumbass story, that it was a lie"
"Are you mad at me?"
"I'm far from mad, I am highly pissed at you. how could you? out here selling, and possibly doing drugs. how am I supposed to protect yo ass from a drug lord? huh Carlos? just get out"
"I don't know Carmen, I'm sorry and I mean that. please don't throw me out, I'm begging you! please!"
I couldn't even bare to look at him anymore. I just told him whatever and stormed out. I cried all night wondering why Is my family so messed up in the head? I'm pissed as Fuck at him and my mother. he's becoming just like her and I'm not gonna sit and watch the closest person to me fade away into the darkness. if he leaves me on this earth alone, ill have no one.
I want to help him, but this is my hard earned money that I worked my ass off for, LITERALLY! he's lucky I'm letting him stay if he slips up again he's gone. No emotions involved. I'm done trying to protect and care for the ones I love, but they don't appreciate it. im just done.
11:08 pm
I woke up to see a text from August. it said...
Double A❤ - Hey , um I was wondering if you would like to go on a date with me tomorrow. I know your probably not gonna answer at this moment but, I just grew some balls at this very moment. so please? it would really help get my mind off things to see your pretty face.
I smiled really hard. I wanted to reply right now but I think ill wait until tomorrow morning, I need to catch as much sleep tonight so I can become myself again tomorrow because tonight was the worst one yet. I sat my phone back on the charger on my night stand then fell back to sleep.
