The Mountain East (An Undertale Fanfiction)

Chapter 24

"LV, or LOVE, is an acronym. it stands for level of violence. a way of measuring someone's capacity to hurt. a way to quantify the bloodlust and will to survive of a person, at the expense of emotions and rationality."

Chara squirmed in her seat. She wasn't exactly fond of Sans' explanation, of Alphys' judging stare regarding her statistics. She hated how awfully close it described her situation. She hated how awfully close it described humanity.

"LV, despite everything, has it's... perks. for example, the gaining of LV affects the owner's other stats as well. they become stronger, sturdier, harder to kill. it becomes easier to distance yourself from your morals and emotions. it incites a strong fervor of survival."

Chara's expression darkened. She spoke, trying to rid herself of the emotions of remembrance. She chuckled to herself. At least she hadn't totally lost the ability to feel. "What is HP?" This time, it was Alphys that came to her aid.

"H - HP is an acronym as well! I – It stands for Hope. The way of q – quantifying a soul's ability to hold onto matter. The more HP, the stronger a person's physical form is. The more h – hope, the more survivability."

Chara nodded. Her mind was not exactly in the same place as her conscience was. It had already wandered off into the depths of the past. Of... him. His words made no sense, yet it held an undeniable amount of wisdom in them. His dark hood, his aura of mystery shrouding him along with the darkness of the water. His... hands. Or a lack thereof.

How he had made her doubt. What cowardice, she thought to herself. How can I expect Asriel to trust me when I can't even trust myself?

"C - Chara?" Alphys snapped her out of her trance. "I - If you don't mind, we can continue e – examining the soul."

"What? Yeah, yeah sure." She waved her hand at the two scientists. "Do whatever."

Sans frowned skeptically. Alphys left the room to grab several things (that were most definitely noodles), but not before eyeing Chara one last time. As the door closed, Sans stood up from the chair in which he was sitting and paced around the room.

"'do whatever'? that doesn't sound like you."

Chara sighed and regarded Sans with a pained look. His expression was one of worry, his eye sockets angled and the tip of his everlasting smile slightly upturned. She didn't expect him to understand, but it wasn't exactly like she could tell it to Asriel. He would just turn everything for the better, purview the situation in a positive limelight. Sometimes, the bleak and ordinary outshined the positivity. She didn't need to give more hope.

She didn't need to give more promises that she couldn't keep.

"You ever feel overwhelming guilt not over things you've done, but by things you haven't? Every time I bring myself to do any sort of selfless act, my cowardice gets the better of me. It's the feeling of debt, you know? Emotions are worth more in carats than gold, and I've been gambling a dangerous game. I promise things I'll know I cannot achieve, doom a plan and yet be too stubborn to admit I was wrong."

Sans fiddled with a little cheekbone in his right hand, twirling it over and over. He leaned on one of the metallic walls and caught the bone upside down before balancing it on his pinkie. "that's some deep stuff, kid. but trust me on this one. admittedly, I'm no therapist, but I'm sure the one you owe would rather have their actions be kind than a trade."

Chara fell silent. Kindness was not exactly on the same scale as guilt. Survivor's guilt, one could say.

Sans laughed. "that expression on your face... I've seen it too many times before. you're not one to wait around, or rely on others. come on now. we have all the time in the world. let the past be past us."