Back To Darkness

Chapter 13: Bright Eyes

Tohru smiled back at him and Yuki's breathing eased. That morning he had spun awake from a nightmare where a young Yuki gazed peacefully out the window at the moon, which twinkled benevolently before slowly morphing into Akito's face and leering over the quaking boy. Now mere minutes later seeing Tohru helped. It soothed him.

Returning to school that week Yuki found he was more focused again. His grades slowly climbed once more and he found himself involved in conversations, no longer zoning out. He still sometimes caught himself remembering the burning of his feet with painful clarity, or felt the eerie shivers as Akito washed himself in the shower with him, or the trembling of the child within him as Akito whispered his insults.

He still remembered. He still felt it all.

You are vile. Unlovable. Pathetic and weak. A disgusting abomination. A monster. A freak...

Sometimes he jerked awake in the night with the mantra dancing in his head. Sometimes it would peek up when he was at school, or laughing with Tohru and Kyo.

He still felt it. And he still struggled when its poison coursed through him. But now... he had an anchor. Tohru. She would smile at him, or lightly touch his hand, and he would be lifted from the darkness. He would resurface, sometimes gasping, but always grateful. And her smile would welcome him home.

After school, he would happily help Tohru with the housework. They laughed together as the sheets blew in their faces and wrapped around them as they tried to hang them. Tohru would wash the dishes and carefully pass them to Yuki to dry, which more often than not ended in one or both of them covered in bubbles. When she dusted, Yuki would stand ready with the furniture polish, often losing focus on his task because of his awe of Tohru. Her attention to detail, the small frown in her forehead, the flush in her cheeks, all rendered her absolutely fascinating and endearing to him.

He was enjoying his time spent with Kyo too. They had occasionally sparred in the evenings since Yuki had attacked him, but it was friendly, and Yuki felt they were helping each other, both in their fighting, and as people. He saw how Kyo interacted with Tohru and Shigure, the easy going way he had with people, and he aspired to be like him. When Tohru went to work the two would usually spar until they were exhausted, and then retire to the porch with much needed glasses of lemonade. Then they would often talk, of school and friends, of anything and everything. One evening Kyo told him that Kagura had visited him when he was injured at the main house, and he blushed as he told Yuki they were going to the cinema that weekend. Yuki had smiled, pleased for his friend.

It was a very pleasant pace of life for Yuki. He enjoyed the company of his friends; having fun and learning with them.

Two weeks after he had shared everything with Tohru, Akito summoned Yuki to the main house. Yuki had been expecting it; the knowledge that he would have to return soon had lurked at the back of his mind for some time, like an irksome itch. This time however, Tohru knew the implications of the visit. She watched his face carefully as Shigure tentatively informed Yuki that Akito was sending a car that evening. Yuki, in return, smiled sadly at her.

She found him late that afternoon, sitting on the porch. He was quiet and relaxed, his body almost swaying in the breeze which rustled the trees. She sat with him, taking his hand in both of hers. At length she asked if he was alright, if there was anything she could do, if he had to go. He turned to face her.

"I knew I would have to return. The rat's place is beside the God and Akito... likes to have me close. There's nothing you can do and I wouldn't ask it of you even if there was."

He smiled gently at her. Her fingers rubbed soothing circles. It helped. It made him sound braver than he was, allowed him to steady his voice.

"I have to return, yes. Knowing that... doesn't really make it any easier though" He gave a small, unintentional grimace. She opened her mouth as though to speak, but he bent his head gracefully to her hands and laid a delicate kiss there, and she never continued. Her fingers stilled and she looked intently at him.