Back To Darkness

Chapter 6: Aftermath

Yuki waited until the water was steaming. Gritting his teeth he stepped into the shower, hissing as the water hit his bloody, shredded back. His pushed his hands forcefully through his matted hair. His back stung and the water ran red down his legs, pooling mesmorisingly for a moment before twisting down the drain. Yuki didn't care; it felt so good to get clean. He closed his eyes, letting his forehead rest against the wall. The hot water hammered down. He tried to absorb the heat, to let it clense him. It was Akito's en-suite bathroom. Everything was pristine, the cold white marble and hard black slate contrasting elegantly. Yuki had used this shower many times. As a child this was where he washed, or was washed by Akito, before school. Now, as with the week before, it was where Akito sent him to get clean before returning to Shigure's house.

Yuki shivered despite the heat. Since Akito's attack on Saturday night Yuki had not seen him until just five minutes ago. He had sat silently in his room all day, watching the light grow and fade and feeling achingly alone. It had been a particularly vicious attack, ruthless and without warning. No part of him had been spared. As usual his back bore the majority of the injuries, but he had also recieved several wounds to his legs, feet and stomach. An especially unpleasant cut on his thigh made walking painful. The single injury which concerned him most was a delicate cut which traced almost gracefully from ear to collar bone. He didn't know how he would explain this, and the thought of Shigure, Tohru- anyone, learning the truth, the truth of how weak he was, made his stomach clench. When Akito had finally entered his room Yuki feared further violence and shrank away. Akito meerly extended his hand however, and when Yuki took it he led him gently to the bathroom. Without a word he had handed Yuki a towel and left.

Yuki lathered his hair with a sweet smelling shampoo and scrubbed fiercely. The water continued to run red. When he felt almost human again and the water ran almost clear, Yuki turned the shower off. He realised he was breathing heavily and worried the latest stress would cause his childhood asthma to resurface. Stepping gingerly from the shower, he wrapped the fluffy white towel around his shoulders, wincing as the soft fibres pressed into his open wounds. The room boasted several large mirrors, though all had been victims of Akito's rage and now showed only a distorted image through their thousonds of shattered fractals. Yuki carefully wiped the steam from one and gently peeled the towel from his back. His stomach churned. Reflected back a thousand times was a mutilated mess. Some cuts were still bleeding, the bright red merging with the water dripping from his hair. In others the skin was pink and puckered and attempting to heal. Yuki saw two sickening flaps of skin hanging loose where several cuts overlapped. He felt sick and sad. Did he deserve this? He couldn't believe he that did. Yuki stared at his distorted, shattered reflection for a long time that evening, wondering.

Unbeknownst to him, Akito watched his every movement from the door.

As he arrived back at Shigure's house Yuki breathed deeply, preparing himself. Akito had handed him a crisp shirt and neatly-pressed trousers and watched quietly and hungrily from the bed as Yuki dressed. The only things he had said were that he had decided a visit from Hatori every week was unneccesary, that every two weeks should suffice, and that he would see Yuki again on Friday. With that Yuki was silently escorted to the car, and driven away from the Sohma estate. The car stopped at Shigure's house and Yuki sighed. Akito's silence concerned him but he was so relieved to be home. He hoped he would be able to act normally.

When he entered, Tohru, Shigure and Kyo were playing some board game. He watched silently from afar for a minute, observing how they interacted. He found it touching. Tohru smiled almost constantly, appearing quite content between the other two. She was so beautiful when she smiled. Kyo seemed to be sulking a little, as usual, but Yuki noticed how he smiled when no-one was looking, and the way he looked at Tohru. Shigure seemed more composed than the other two; there was less open smiling but Yuki detected a certain happiness or pride in him. In that moment he felt so happy. And so sad. It was a perfect picture, warm, safe. And he was not in it.