FALLING IN LOVE AGAIN

Staying Together

Neel sat in front of his laptop, lost in his thoughts. Manjari's behaviour was raising more and more questions in his mind. He checked the date on his calendar gain. It was almost mid-November and Manjari was yet to get in touch with him. He had tried calling her a few times and left messages, but she had not responded to any of them.

He leaned back on his chair. He was getting more and more sure that something had happened...something so bad that Manjari had closed the doors of her heart again and this time the doors were so firmly shut that all the knocking, kicking had not even opened them a crack. Yet. If she was determined to avoid him at all costs, he was determined to win her over at all costs. And he could not win her over by just thinking. He needed to take concrete measures.

He looked at his work again and sighing closed the laptop. There was no point. His heart was not in his work. He decided to return to the department room. Maybe, somebody, there had some news on Manjari.

Manjari woke up in the middle of the night. It had become a pattern for her in the last few months. Ever since Neel had entered her life again. He was like this winter blizzard that had disrupted her calm again. She got up from the bed, fully awake now and headed for the windows. The curtains were tightly drawn. Her fingers itched to push away the curtains, but she could not. She could not look at the moon and not think of all the days spent with him. She cursed him again. Her room had huge bay windows, but she could not enjoy them. He had ruined everything for her. She curled up on the window seat and pushed the curtains just an inch. As expected, she was flooded with overwhelming feelings, of memories she could not shut down. She wished, she wished.... She shook her head again and reminded herself that reality was different. The truth had been difficult to swallow but it had to be done.

She went back to her first meeting with Neel at the University of Toronto.

The moment she had seen him, she had been angry. With an intensity, she did not know she was capable of. She damned him for being there. She damned her fate for not letting her be. She damned him for being so full of himself, for not letting her go. More than anything, she had damned herself for letting him in her life in the first place.

She felt a sharp pain in her palms, the result of her gripping the edges of the seat too hard. She had not been happy, but she had been at peace. He had come and ruined it. Again.

She leaned back against the window frame, wondering what to do next. Her eyes fell on her mobile phone and a tired sigh escaped from her lips. He was not giving up. He had been calling and messaging regularly. She was surprised at his audacity and his shamelessness. He knew the reasons for her breaking all contact with him yet he continued to persist. His you-hurt-me act had been rankling her nerves and the other day when he had...

She calmed down the memories again. It hurt. It still hurt. She did not know what to do. She had never once contemplated what would happen if Neel came into her life again. Not once had she contemplated how would she handle the situation. And no when she was in the situation, she was even more confused.

She stood up from the chair and walked out of the room. On her way to the kitchen, she glanced into Amaira's room She was sleeping on her side, her expression peaceful. She adjusted her blanket and made her way t the kitchen. She stood in the middle of the kitchen, looking around. This home was her dream home. When she had landed in Toronto all those months back, she had channelled all her heartbreak and her pain in creating this oasis. But even the house was failing her today...

Nothing had changed in her house. Everything was where she had left it. Her laptop was still open on the coffee table, her research notes exactly the way she had left them. Everything had been put away...nothing had been left on countertops. Yet she felt everything was messy...