𝗳𝗿𝗮𝗴𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗰𝗲

𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝙍𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨

𝘎𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘧 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘸𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦- 𝘘𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘌𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘢𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘩 𝘐𝘐

It was a week after Erin's deceasal, the B.A.U had been in the office working nonstop. After Erin's death, they went back to virginia to work from there. Alex was exhausted, she had worked without breaks and the fact Erin had died made things ten times worse. Because Not many people knew of the history Alex and Erin had, Alex couldn't tell anyone about how she was feeling. About the anger, the grief, the pain and the regret. The regret that she didn't forgive erin upon her arrival. It was clear Erin was trying to make up for her mistakes, but Alex took it as a mockery and walked away. 

When hotch gave the order for them  to go home, everyone started packing their bags. Alex was grabbing her stuff when she noticed a letter signed with the initials E.S, she knew it was erin. Alex looked up, there was David looking at her with a sad smile, "She wanted me to give this to you if something happened." alex just stood there with tears in her eyes. "do you want to read it alone or should i come with you?" david offered, "dave, please. i could not stand being alone, but i could not stand being alone right now, would you mind it if i come over tonight?" Alex didn't dare to look him in the eyes, being ashamed of being this fragile. "Alex don't worry you are always welcome, you are in no state to drive right now. I am taking you with me." David stated with no space for talking back. 

Alex and David stepped into the house, Alex barely made it to the counter before breaking down. She felt as if she had lost everyone, First Erin, then ethan, then James to another woman and now Erin once again. But this time forever. David sighed, grabbing two whiskey glasses and a bottle of whiskey. The only one who would understand her and not push her away was dead and gone.

Alex opened the envelope, not knowing how to react when she saw her favourite flower, a dried rose. And the letter itself.  She started reading.

Dear Alexandra, if you read this letter. I'm probably dead, John has been after me for some time now. When you guys quit investigating. I went out on my own, this appeared to be a mistake, I do not know if i am dead or if i am in WitSec. But i need you to know that i couldn't have made the 1 year sober without you, even if you did not know it, you were my  rock in my battle against alcoholism. When i tried to make amends, i was exactly one year sober. So, of course it hurt when you shrugged it off. I asked David to give you this letter, i know he is there with you. 

I love you both very dearly, and i am so sorry for what i did considering the amerithrax case. It is unforgivable, i almost ruined your whole career, i also take the blame for the replicator. He would not have been like this if i did not betray you two back then.  if you read this letter,  you got him.  I am so proud of the both of you, i knew you could do this. I am sorry it had come to this, i  am so sorry for what i put the both of you through. Now david, there is a letter for you in the bedroom drawer in your room. And alexandra stop gaping like a fish. David please leave now. this is for alex

there were multiple letters folded into the big one

Alex started with the smallest one

Dearest Lexie, i miss you terribly. It has been a week after they sent you away and things have not been the same without you. I am so sorry for  betraying you, i have been getting worse and worse. The voices in my head stopped, but i started drinking. It numbs the pain.

all my love: Erin

Alex sniffled, she felt guilty. She had been the reason for Erin's drinking problems all along.

With much hesitation she opened the second one

dear lexie, it's been 10 years since you left. And i decided to get into rehab, I promised that if i would make it  one year sober i would contact you and make things right between us. you did not deserve everything i put you through.

With much love: Erin

the sniffling had turned into full on sobbing now, Alex hated being this vulnerable. But she could not help it.

So she opened another one

 Dearest alexandra, it has been 20 years, i almost dropped on the spot when i saw you at the office today. I made it to one year sober yesterday, so when i saw you walking in. I tried to make amends as soon as i could. But when i finally gathered the courage to do so, you shrugged it off. 

Its what i deserved, i know. But it still hurt, and i am gonna try again when i make it 1,5 year. I hope you will be ready then.

with all my love: Erin

she was shaking now, it hurt. Knowing she was the cause and remedy of it all. she opened the last one, the smallest one.

Dear Alexandra, The replicator is after me. i do not have anything to say except i love you, i always did. 

with all my love: Erin

Shaking; she put the letters down, Erin had written all of this. And Alex's anger hurt her so much she couldn't even gather the courage to send them. 

David walked in, visibly in tears. Alex went out to hug him, but he stopped her. He stepped away from the doorstep. There she was, the woman who was supposed to be dead, The woman Alex just read everything about, the woman she had been grieving over for more than a week. 

"David Stephen Rossi you better explain what the fuck is going on or i will not hesitate to give the team another unsub." Alex's sadness slowly turned into fury, she thought the woman she loved was dead, but here she was. In David's doorstep. Visibly crying.

"Alex, in my defense i was not supposed to tell you." david added before leaving

alex said nothing, she just ran up to Erin, holding on for dear life. Both women were sobbing by now. "Alexandra i am so sorry, The program only allowed me one contact person, and you were still mad at me." Erin confessed cupping Alex's face. "It's alright, i completely understand. Just do not do this to me again." Alex leaned in; their foreheads touching, Alex's arms slowly creeping around Erin's waist. "Erin i am so so-" Erin cut her off by smashing her lips against Alex's. Alex's hand flew to Erin's hair.

things would be alright for now

𝗶 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗹𝘆 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲. 𝗜 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂

- 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗲 𝗕𝗿𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲; 𝗝𝗮𝗻𝗲 𝗘𝘆𝗿𝗲