Shrek X Barry B Benson

Barry's Crush

Shrek was a strange man. He wasn't popular with people, it seemed like most actually hated him. Barry knew this but still he couldn't stop his heart from skipping a beat every time he saw shrek. He sits behind shrek in class so how Barry's heart just hasn't stopped is a mystery to all, even god. But, Barry lives anyway because he doesn't give a damn about whether his heart is moving or not.

Barry was doodling little hearts in the corner of his notebook when the teacher called everyone's attention.

'hello class, I am going to call attendance now' she spoke in a crotchety voice which was weird because she was like 30.
'elmo? Alright, eggman? Good, shadow the hedgehog? Sonic the hedgehog? Fiona? Gru? Barry B Benson?'

Barry sat up alert at his name being called. His heart raced and hands sweat. He always dreaded answering role call… he began shaking violently as the thought of shrek not liking his voice filled him with fear.
He had to do it.
He had to answer.
'here'

HE HAD DONE IT!
HIS FEAR WAS NO MORE!
SHREK WASN'T DISGUSTED BY HIS WEIRD BEE VOICE!
Barry felt amazing. He was amazing. If only shrek could see that…

'shrek?' the teacher called out.

'here' shrek replied.
His deep Scottish voice filled Barry's bee ears and traveled into his little bee heart. Barry found shreks voice segsy and wanted to hear him moan Barry's name.

Barry felt his 'stinger' extend. Oh no, not in the middle of class! Barry sat as still as he could, his 'stinger' was very sensitive and the new uniforms they added were very very tight. Apparently it was "indecent" to walk around with no clothes on. Shameful.

Soon class was over and it was time for lunch. Barry sat with his friends Shadow the hedgehog, he was dark and edgy, all the girls liked him and even some of the boys, and his other friend, Gru. Gru was tall with a long long nose. He was built similarly to a dorito chip.

"sooo Barry," Gru spoke cheerfully, "do you have a crush on anyone?"
Barry felt his bee face go red
"M-Maybe…" he twirled his antenna around his finger coyly. Gru gasped loudly.
"WHO IS IT!!?!?"
Barry paused. He looked over at shrek who was eating a chair. His heart fluttered like there were lots of smaller bees in it.
"take a guess…" Barry mumbled doing
👉👈 with his bee hands. Gru looked around the lunch hall. Or at least he tried to, not having a neck makes looking around a room one hell of a challenge, having to move at the waist instead of the neck.
"It's Shrek isn't it" Shadow spoke without looking up from his sandwich. Barry went bright red.
"y-yeah…" Barry stuttered, his face heating up intensely.
"You should confess to him!" gru squealed, shaking his head. Everyone in the vicinity ducked for cover, gru's massive nose hit someone and sent them flying like a baseball bat hitting a home run. Barry looked over at shrek who had moved onto eating the table. He sighed,
"I really want to, I just can't bring up the courage to" he did 👉👈 with his hands again. Shadow finally looked up from his sandwich.
"leave it to me, I'll set it up," he stood up and walked out of the lunch hall. Gru sprung up from his seat and skipped after him. Its quite the sight seeing gru move. A horrific one but a sight none the less. Barry watched Shrek eat everything in his path, he imagined a life with shrek, he needed a life with shrek. Hopefully Shadow's idea works...

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621 words

Hello it is me, the author.

I have decided to try my hand at a crack fic and I think it's gone well lol

I'll probably update every few days but that depends on how much I'm writing and if I've written enough for it to be considered a chapter

Thank for reading this 🙏