Never Told You

Chapter Nineteen

River pulled up to a hotel. We were in Helper, Utah. We had driven for a long time.

"We needed to get away. You needed a break from everything that was happening around you. I'm sorry I didn't get you away sooner." I nodded.

"It's okay. Can we just go inside? I need to get out of the car." River nodded and helped me out of the car. We went to the desk and he paid for a room. He reserved three nights. We unloaded our stuff and then went to bed.

"Good morning River." He muffled words into his pillow and turned away from me. It felt good to sleep next to him again, but he wasn't off the hook completely. He shouldn't have trusted Molly.

"What do you want for breakfast? I'll go pick it up."

"Um, I don't know. Surprise me. I'm not that picky." River nodded and got up. He threw some clean clothes on, grabbed his keys, and left. While I waited for him, I showered, made the bed, and read a little on my phone. River walked back in, and set the food down on the bed.

"The diner was a bit far, and they were super busy. Sorry for taking awhile. This is my favorite place to get breakfast here." River pulled food out, and handed it to me. He got us the same thing. I was grateful he didn't see me as some girl who only ate things like salad. I took a bite of the breakfast sandwich, and it was amazing.

"This is so good. Thank you." He nodded and we continued eating. He finished before me, and began talking.

"My mom used to take me here all the time for mini vacations to get away from my dad. This is where we always got our breakfast. I haven't been here for a really long time, and I figured you'd like it just as much." I nodded. I finished my sandwich, then replied.

"I do, and the breakfast is really good. We should've come sooner."

"Lauren, I am so sorry about what happened. I regret talking to them. Alyssa said Molly was threatening her, and I had to help. Alyssa is a good person, and what she did shouldn't define who she is." I frowned.

"What did she do?" River sighed like he didn't want to tell me.

"She accidentally killed her sister. It was her younger sister. She gave her sister a hit of cocaine and the hit was too strong for her little body. Molly recorded it." I was surprised.

"Wow...How long ago was this? What happened with her sister?"

"Well, the cops called it an accidental overdose. Alyssa was suspected to have given them to her, but they dropped their case. This happened two years ago."

"I'm sorry to hear that, but she should've been more careful."

"I agree, but we were all there. We are all responsible for it. I could've stopped them, but I didn't." I nodded my head no. Why was River blaming himself?

"I know how you feel, but it wasn't your fault. Anyone could have intervened. It's not your fault for not stopping them. They were old enough to make their own decisions."

"I guess you're right. It's still something she shouldn't be threatened with though." I nodded in agreement.

"Drugs are a tricky thing. Molly is a bitch. Why hasn't anyone tried getting rid of the evidence on Molly's phone?"

"I don't know. We never thought of it I guess. I'll call Julian, and he'll figure it out." I nodded. We continued making small talk, and it felt like the time we had just flown by. River made me put my shoes on, and said he was taking me somewhere. We drove for 15 minutes, and I saw a small carnival.

"Awww, no way! This is cool. I've been to a carnival. According to my parents, it was a privilege I never earned." River sighed, and grabbed my hand. He parked the car, and came around to my side to open my door.

"Come on, let's go." We rode a couple rides, then played a bunch of games. We went on the ferris wheel last.

"I've always wanted to ride one of these." River chuckled at me. We started spinning, and when we were on top the ride stopped. An announcement was played over the speaker music was playing from. They said the ride and a cart that got jammed, and it needed to be fixed.

"Lauren, I need to tell you something." I looked at River. He was fidgeting with his hands. He looked nervous.

"What is it, River?"

"I've told you this before, but I love you Lauren. I have never felt this was for anybody. I'm so sure about you. I know that I have fucked up, multiple times. I was scared of this relationship, and hurting you. I was scared to feel anything for anybody. I've managed to hurt you a lot, and you're still with me. Call me crazy, but you should've left me. However, I'm glad you're still with me. I'm not scared of feeling anymore, and I'm never going to hurt you again. I can swear on my life about that. Now, you're carrying my child. That makes me even more in love with you. I know I seem like the type that wouldn't step up as a father, but I want to. I want to be a parent to this child, with you. I want us to be in this together, and be happy." I had processed everything River had said, but I felt there was more.

"I want that too, but I know this isn't all of it. Please, continue."

"Lauren, please take everything I have said into consideration. I say this because I mean all of it. I say this because you're an amazing woman, and if you don't want this, I completely understand. I'm not pressuring you into anything."

"Okay..now you're just making me nervous River. Get on with it."

"Lauren, would you do the honors of making me the happiest man on Earth, and marry me?"