The King's Rival [kagehina]

Chapter 5: Advice

[A/N: I do not condone underage drinking. Don't do it, kids. Just wait till you're legal.]

The King was drunk. He had been at a party at the off-campus apartment that Bokuto and Kuroo shared, since they were upperclassmen. It was a small group, only about a dozen people, and they had been just hanging out, playing beer pong and video games and listening to music. And Kageyama had been drinking steadily all night, trying to drown his sorrows. Now I'm a fucking cliche, he thought to himself.

It was after 1:00 am and most everyone had left except Noya and Kageyama. The four were sitting in the living room, chilling and talking about volleyball and their upcoming tournament. Well three of them were talking about volleyball. Kageyama was in a chair with his head resting on the back and his eyes closed. He was trying to decide if he was too drunk to go back to his room. And, of course, thinking about HIM.

The booze had helped distract him for a while, but now he was coming down and the Tangerine was taking over his thoughts again. Fucking Hinata, he thought.

Kuroo: "What, bro?"

Shit. Did I say that out loud? Thought Kageyama. He didn't respond, hoping they would ignore it. The other three shared looks that Kags didn't see and seemed to decide it was time to confront Kageyama about the recent rift between him and the redhead.

Noya: "Dude, what's going on with you two? You haven't hardly talked to him since we came back from break. Before that, you two were always hanging out."

Another moment of silence.

Kageyama: "I'm a fucking idiot."

Bokuto: "Yeah, we know" earning him a slap to the back of the head from Kuroo.

The three waited again while Kageyama debated whether to tell them the whole story. He never really opened up with his feelings, shit, some people probably thought he didn't have any. But these three losers were the closest friends he had, besides Hinata. So maybe it would feel good to get it off his chest? At least some of it. Definitely not ALL of it. A deep breath and then a decision.

Kageyama: "Right before break, Hinata confessed to me."

Kuroo: "Damn, I knew it. You owe me $20, owl boy." Bokuto pouted.

Kageyama lifted his head slightly and opened his eyes to look at his friends. "You guys knew?"

Kuroo: "At least some of us" (side eye to Bokuto) "strongly suspected. It actually was pretty obvious seeing you two together."

Kageyama was slowly taking in that information in his hazy, still drunk brain.

Kageyama: "It wasn't obvious to me."

Noya snorted. "We know that too."

Bokuto: "So what happened when he confessed? You rejected him?"

Kageyama was silent for another minute, recounting in his head that awful scene. He internally shuddered.

Kageyama: "I didn't exactly reject him... I- I didn't actually say anything. I just left."

Noya: "Dude! That was harsh! Why do that to your best friend? You could have at least just told him you're straight and just think of him as a friend."

Kageyama thought back to how he panicked that night. How all he could think about was getting out of there and getting air. But no one here knew that he had panic attacks, hell who would even believe him since they thought he had no emotions? And he was going to keep it that way.

Kageyama: "I was just ... confused. I didn't know what to say or feel. I just had to get out of there and think, you know."

The others sort of nodded and waited for him to go on.

Kageyama: "Once I calmed down, I tried to text him but he was mad, or hurt I guess, and now he won't talk to me at all."

Kuroo observed "And he's been hanging out with the new guy."

Kageyama nodded curtly.

Kuroo continued: "And you're jealous."

Kageyama's head jerked up to look at the older boy. "No."

Noya snorted again and Kuroo softly hyena laughed and Bokuto said "Oya?"

A minute of silence, followed by Kuroo observing diplomatically "Miya is a setter like you. It would be perfectly understandable if you were feeling threatened by his arrival to the team."

Kageyama was thankful for the out. "Yeah, I guess he does make aware that I need to always be on the top of my game."

Bokuto asked: "But it's hard because you're distracted by this stuff with Hinata?"

Kageyama nodded stiffly. Talking it out with his friends wasn't so bad, he thought. Another minute passed when they were all quiet waiting for Kags to continue, but when he didn't, Kuroo ventured:

"And are you sure this has nothing to do with Hinata and Miya getting so close?"

Kageyama flinched. Why did that have to be true? He'd come this far, so maybe it was time to just lay it all out there.

"I guess it does. I guess I just got used to having Hinata there and now that's he's not, I- I miss him."

The others shared another knowing glance.

Bokuto: "You miss your best friend?"

Kageyama: "Yes. But ..." OK, here goes, he thought. "But maybe I want to be more than friends?" he ended the sentence like a question.

Bokuto: "Dude, I thought you were straight!" Another slap to the back of the head from Kuroo.

Kageyama: "I assumed I was too. But like, I've never been interested in anyone, guys or girls. And now I don't know, you know?"

Kuroo: "OK, so what are you going to do? You obviously have to tell him how you feel."

Kags: "He won't talk to me, remember? He's with Pisshead all the fucking time." The other three chuckled at the nickname.

Bokuto: "You need to keep trying."

Kageyama whispered: "What if it's already too late? What if he hooks up with Miya? Have you seen them together? Pisshead is obviously into Hinata."

The others looked at each other and then back at Kags with sympathy, knowing it was true.

Noya: "You still have to try, bro. And if you're too late, well..."

Kageyama stared at Nishinoya for several seconds, finishing the thought in his head. If he was too late and Hinata and Pisshead got together, he would still have to see them together all of the time, but he would have to push down his jealousy and just deal with it. Maybe even at some point, try to be happy for his friend.

FML, thought Kageyama.