It's Just Part of the Deal

Part 11

I sat there in silence on the couch, just letting Bill hold me against him. With all the information I've just learned I feel numb. Cold. Tom and Marco are soulmates. Bill and I are soulmates. I was killed in the Salem which trials and hand kids, and have probably been killed several times before and have died in probably everyway imaginable through all my past incarnations. It's a lot to take in but for some reason I can't seem to get the thought outta my head: I could end this cycle.

I could end this cycle, but it would require me to watch all that I love and care about to grow old and die. And the process will be painful. Very painful. Yet my mind continues to circle back to Bill and how he's done just that for, not even he remembers, how long. The problem is this; I don't love him. Not like I did in previous lives. As well if those are anything to go by, he'd mentioned that there were times he didn't get to me fast enough and was already with someone, so that proves that while he will always love me. I could fall out of love with him. Right? He's loved me, suffered for me, but he's also hurt me. He's hurt others cause of me. I sigh, taking hold of Bill's hands and gently removing them from around me. "I have to go, Mable and Pacifica are going to get suspicious."

He nods, taking my hands in his once we get to our feet. "I'm sorry to have put you through this. I normally try to keep all this horribleness a secret to protect you."

"I-It's okay...I pushed." I mutter, staring at our hands. "I just..."

Shushing me, he let's go of one of my hands to place his on the back of my head, tilting it forward and placing a kiss to my forehead. "I understand it's a lot to take in and you need time to process everything. Regardless of whether you decide to be with me again like in the past, share this life simply as friends or avoid me entirely I will accept your decision. I've learned from my mistakes and now understand to simply take what each life is willing to give and be content."

My eyes widen and I can feel the slight burn of tears but I quickly brush them away and hug him. "I won't avoid you. I won't leave, I promise.  Just promise me that you won't ever, no matter what happens to me, have a repeat of the past."

He nods, kissing my wrists. "Of course."

I smile, giving him a hug one last time before running outside and around to the back of the cabin where my bike was hidden. I make sure to leave the forest to the main road before heading back into town and then the shack to make it seem like I actually had left for Crystal Springs. Once I make it back to the shack I park my bike in the garage and head inside, finding Mable and Pacifica sitting at the table eating dinner.

"Dipper! You're back!" Mable smiles, jumping up and hugging me tightly. "How's Marco is everything okay? You left without saying a word."

I smile, chuckling nervously. "Kinda, he um...has this creepy 'secret admirer' and it's getting a little on the dangerous side."

"Is he okay?" Pacifica asks, leaning back in her seat to look over her shoulder at us.

I shrug. "Not really? He's honestly just really freaked out by the whole situation and has been staying with Tom but I'm not sure how much longer he'll be able to deal with it."

"Well he's always welcome if he wants to get away." Mable smiles, guiding me to the table to join them for dinner. I nod, a sick feeling growing in the pit of my stomach.

I don't like this feeling, something's not right. I feel like this is just the calm before a storm. What's coming?