Alive again

Oh, it's dark in here. Where's Lieutenant, though?

Apparently it wasn't over yet for me.

The hole had closed and it was pitch-dark in there. Saying I wasn't afraid would be lying.

Ok, so I was still alive... alive? Was I alive before falling but after waking  up in the ruins?

I was, and that is enough.

I also hadn't lost any limb nor piece of clothing. It was all fine. But wait. Lieutenant! I couldn't see anything, I wouldn't see a black cat in the dark neither. My only hope was  that she had survived thanks to anything escaping my understanding. Yeah, I needed faith. Lots.

I could hear them. Lurking in the dark. Paying attention to my movements, curious about the thing they judged inedible being able to move. Devouring corpses. Once I got used to the scarce lighting, I saw deers. Dogs. Horses. People, even children among the half eaten corpses. Almost every corpse in there belonged to a civilian. I would've cried if I still had the organs for that.

Then, amidst my grief, a drop of hope. A distant meow. It was her, no doubt. I had to hurry, for the Hive wasn't deaf either.I ran for what felt like an eternity and found her. She was eating bugs from the Hive although they were twice her size. In was a Râal-esque spectacle, with all of the organs and fluids scattered across the floor. I grabbed her and started running after she meowed in what sounded like a complaint: "I wasn't finished, there's still food!" I imagined she meant to say.

This things have an entrance, a hole big enough to keep a constant flow of them. This nest was relatively small, so it was probably just a few hundred meters from us in any direction. We would be safe in case there was no queen. If this was, as it looked like, the remnants of a war party from long ago, everything would be alright.

Finally, I thought. Light. Sunlight. Saráh's blessing. I had never felt more relieved when abandoning a cave.

We made our way through the narrow hole and exited it. Out. Blinding amounts of light lazily licking me like a dog that's seen its owner for the first time in months after he's gone. I knew the gods were favoring me since I found Lieutenant. The black cat has been my family's allegory since my great great great grandfather Toltio found one which led him to where he later would stablish himself.

How did I remember this all of a sudden? Dawn's sunlight was already red and my head ached a bit. Lighting change if I had to guess. My memory has been doing whatever it wanted since I woke up. It was weird to remember that, taking a glimpse to such a concretionary memory.

Fate, I suppose. Heh. My entire conception of myself is now fate.

My fate was to wake up, my fate was to find lieutenant, my fate was to remember loose facts at a random pace.

Oh, fate. The hands of the Gods themselves... and I was hanging on them now, apparently, more than ever. Wait. There's light. 

I turned my head south and I saw it. Light, artificial light. Civilization, and most definitely, the capital city. Finally. Home.

I was a tad overexcited, though. I was way farther than I expected from it, not to mention  I was walking in the wrong direction all the time.

I still ignored if I had physiological needs, but tried running as fast as possible, drunk in happiness and high in hope.

Emotions are like drugs, you know? More like medicines. They help. They're useful and normal. It's experiencing them vividly or going through a lot what is bad. You can't overdose without awful side effects. You can also get addicted  to a feeling, and repeat what gives you the feeling or be with whoever does so more than it'd be normal. "Wellfare in life in equilibrium lies". Too much or too few is bad. Life is about balance.