You Will Always be Our Little Girl

☆ eighteen ☆

Mabel's POV

I look down at the ground as I swing softly back and forth.

"I bet I could go higher than you!"

"Try me short stack!"

I chuckle softly at the stupid memory as I look at the swing next to me to see no one there.

"Hey, Mae!" I look up to see Daiki. I convince a smile and wave. I wipe my eyes and look back down at the ground. He sits on the swing next to me, but god I wished it was someone else.

"Where were you today?"

"Uhm..I-I felt sick.." he kneels down in front of me and furrows his eyebrows, "have you been crying?"

Well, yes, sir. I have. Imagine if your best friend was rushed to the ER, half dead and you were in the middle of all of it without an explanation.

Men are stupid. Do we all agree with that?

"Uhm..yeah..kind of." I smile awkwardly as he gets up.

"Why?" I look down at my dangling feet, "...I just...Mason's in the hospital...and he was-" I wipe my eyes, "he was rushed to the ER.."

"Did he finally decide to listen to me and kill himself?" I look up at him and furrow my eyebrows in frustration. I need to let this annoyance out.

"What's fucking wrong with you?" I stand up. He shrugs, "he's a freak, Mae. You've said it yourself. It's about time he's out of the picture."

"He has a fucking brain tumor, Daiki! A fucking BRAIN TUMOR! You know the thing that can kill you instantly if it wanted to?"

"Good." I slap him. Hard enough to where he almost fell backwards. I laugh at him, "you're such an asshat!"

"What's wrong with you, you psycho!?"

"I'M the psycho!? You're encouraging my best friend to take his own life!"

"He just needs to leave anyway! No one would notice! You wouldn't even notice, Mabel!"

"Fuck you, Daiki." I say in his face and he chuckles, "I can ruin your reputation in an instant."

"Yeah? Well I could tell everyone how I'd come to school with bruises on my body from you hitting me. Tell everyone about the amount of times you've touched me no matter how much times I've said no. I could tell everyone. Damn. I could ruin you right here right now, Daiki." I chuckle as a tear rolls down my face, "you have such a punchable face, Daiki."

"Fuck you, Mabel."

"No, Daiki. Fuck you. Go fuck yourself. It's over between us."

"Was planning on it anyway. You're a loser, Mae."

"A loser is better than whatever you are, dick." He rolls his eyes as he walks away, "have fun with lover boy."

He turns the corner and I sigh, sitting back down on the swing.

What did I just do..?

- - -

I pick at my food with the fork as we all sat in silence.

Oh, how much I want to die right now.

I place my fork down as I get out of my seat.

"I'm not hungry.." I say as I put my hood on and race upstairs before either of them could say anything.

About ten minutes later, my papa walks in. I kept my eyes shut as more tears ran out of my eyes. He turns on the light and I shut my eyes tighter, trying to block out the light.

"It's a mess in here, Mae." He says as I open my eyes and see him picking pieces of clothing off the floor and trash, he collects the dishes that were surrounding my desk and all the bundled papers.

It's true. I haven't cleaned my room for nearly a month. It practically smelled like teen spirit. He collects my laundry and puts it outside the door. He comes back in and sits at the foot of the bed. I curled my knees to my chest so I was in a ball. We sat in silence, and it seemed like his silence was speaking words, "I had a boyfriend.." he chuckles, "yeah, your dad and I already came to that conclusion."

"He was an ass.."

"Yeah, swearing is the only thing you aren't allowed to do, Mae." I giggle. He looked over at me and sighed, "those bruises sure as hell weren't from us or Mason. Our only two conclusions were you had a bully or a boyfriend.."

"I thought relationships were supposed to be gentle...easy..." he chuckles. "Yeah, it's not."

"I found that out.." we sit in silence, "what was happening to Mason...? Why did he look like that..?" My dad sighs, "well..Mason is starting to get seizures now, Mae. His tumor is getting worst.." we sit in a silence again, "he was so healthy before...w-why does it need to be him..?"

"That's something I've been trying to figure out for my whole life, Mae. People just get sick...even if they're the healthiest person in the world." I look over at my dad and look back down.

I'm fourteen and still have no clue who my dad is. I don't know anything about his parents. I don't know anything about his life with my father. I don't know anything about him. And he raised me.

"Dad..?"

"Hm?"

"I want to hear more about your life." I look over at the door, "you can't tell your dad."

"Why not..?" I sit up and he smiles, "well, he still thinks your too young to know about my life.."

"Is it really that bad..?" He nods, "yeah.."

"Okay..." I sit back to the walls as I listened. He sighed, "my parents weren't always bad people I guess." He smiled sadly, "well, up until my dad committed suicide...then my mom kind of went...insane without him." I furrow my eyebrows. Okay bad start.

"How old were you?" He looks at me and smiles, "about your age, actually."

"Oh.."

"My mom worked and worked until eventually we took my cousin and went to live in Miyagi. Here."

"And you met dad?"

"Yeah. I ran into him on my way to school. Quite literally." I smile. I guess he's always been just a little bit clumsy.

- - -

"So why does dad think I'm too young for this..?" He shrugs, "I've been trying but he always stopped me. So this will be our little secret." He gets up and heads towards the door, "dad..?"

"Yeah?"

"...uhm...i have questions.."

"About??"

"Dad. I don't know.."

"That's the difference between your dad and me, Mae. I'm the parent that wants to treat you like how I wanted to be treated when I was fourteen. I want you to have privacy and protection, but I also want you to feel like..like that there's someone who kind of understands how a child's brain works."

"Major in psychology." He nods, smiling, "yeah."

"What about dad?"

"Your dad teaches you the difference between right and wrong and will correct you when you're wrong. He's kind of the 'man of the house' is a way, huh?" His smile was soft. A fatherly smile I guess.

"It's late, Mabel. You're staying home from school tomorrow." I sigh in relief that I don't have to ask and my dad chuckles, "goodnight, Mae. Don't stay up too late." He shuts the door behind him and I sigh.

And I think I've gone through the unimaginable-

- - - end of chapter - - -

lol my iron deficiency is not it- it hurts

song: roadtrip - dream ft. pmbata

words: 1250

finished: april 27, 2021 at 4:27 pm.