You Will Always be Our Little Girl

☆ twelve ☆

Mabel's POV

He held my hand most of dinner. I wasn't hungry. At all.

I think I know how spoiled I am. Or just lucky to have parents that didn't force their own trauma and their kids...

My dads never made me eat. If I wasn't hungry, I didn't have to eat. Which was rarely ever, unless I felt sick.

"Can we go..? I-" I whisper to Mason, starting to tear up midway through. He just nods, "uhm..can we be excused?"

"What's going on-?" Dad asks and a tear falls down my face quickly, as I wipe it away. My other dad notices this and nods, "yeah...go ahead. I'll wash the dishes tonight." He smiles, "Kou, you can't-"

"It's fine, Daichi." Mason let's go of my hand as I follow him into my room. I wrap my arms around him and hold him as tight as I can. Like a child hugging a parent.

I cried into his chest, just wanting to get whatever emotions I had out.

I was mad at myself. Upset at myself. Sad for myself. Any emotion you could think of that's the opposite of happiness, I felt it. 

Mason holds me close, petting my head for comfort. He's acting like nothing happened..like whatever is happening to him isn't my fault.

"I'm sorry...I'm so so sorry..." I fall to my knees, dragging him down with me.

"What are you sorry for, Mae?" He chuckles, "t-this is all my fault, Mase...I...I don't want to be here..I don't like my friends, I barely can stand a day without my boyfriend trying to touch me, and I'm just...done with everyone..." I hold him tighter, clenching his shirt. He smelt like what he's always smelt like. His laundry detergent was soft, but it was there. It smelt of lavender and it always made his clothes soft.

"I just want to go back to the time...where it was you and I...against the world...just me and you. No one else.." my dad's laughter echos throughout the house as I hear my other dad's giggles echo as well.

"I want to be like my dads...they've always been happy..." Mason chuckles and sighs, "Mae, they weren't always happy."

"What do you mean...?"

"Have your dads ever told you their story?" I shake my head, shutting my eyes, "no...I stopped asking once they stopped talking about it."

"Daichi lived like how you are...while Kōushi lived..kinda how I am.." I remember dad saying his mom was bad...

"Do you know their story...?" Mason nods, "I do. I could tell you."

"Okay.." I kept my eyes shut, wanting to listen to the story.

"Your dads met when they were about fourteen...and I think you know this, but your dad's mother was..rather abusive, along with his cousin." I nod, "mhm.."

"He used to have a terrible eating disorder...going to the hospital a lot.." I listened, "...and your dad still stayed with him. He said that Daichi would sleep on the chairs in the waiting room if it meant seeing him." I smile lightly, a small laugh coming out, "Mason..?"

"Hm?"

"I know that they broke up for ten years...so why..? Did they tell you..?" He chuckles, starting to pet my head again, "I thought you already knew."

"Eh...I was young...I don't remember."

"Well, your dad lived in Miyagi, while your other dad lived here. Later, Daichi was moving further south to a more farm-like town, and left." I sit up, "he just left..?"

"Well, they broke up first then he left. For ten years."

"But why?" He sighs, "your dad didn't believe that your other dad was the person who he'd grow up with.." I held him closer, "Mason..? Do you believe in soulmates...?" He chuckles as he plays with my hair, "no. I don't believe there's just one person out there for you. Finding a soulmate is more like..uhm..m-more or less like the lottery.."

"What do you mean?" I ask, opening my eyes lightly.

"I-I mean...uhm...finding "the one" is like the lottery..you could try, and one day you'll find them and win..because they're going to fit so well in your world, it's going to be hard imagining them to be gone." We sit in silence, "Mason...?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay..? You're acting as if...I haven't been avoiding you for weeks.." I look up at him and he kept his eyes on my stained face, a small grin on his face, "I'm not sure if you know this, Mabel, but my entire life doesn't circulate around you."

"What are you-" I sit up and he laughs, "that's rude, Mason!"

"It isn't, Mae." I giggle. I sigh as the room settles down. I stretch before getting up off the ground, "I'm tired..."

"You look it." I put my hand on my heart, as if it truly offended me, "wow, Mason, you're being rude tonight."

Before I walk out, Mason speaks up, "Mae."

"Hm?"

"You got tears on my shirt."

"You do have the option to change, dumbass." I laugh at him as I shut the door.

....wow

- - - end of chapter - - -

I'm alive. Just got a 85% on my chemistry test.

song: soft boy - Wilbur

words: 880

finished: april 8, 2021 at 11:18 am.

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-oliver