Friends?

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3rd person POV

"I met P'Ploy" Mark said, playing with the food in front of him. He had accepted Vee's offer for lunch. The boy's mind really found nothing better to do, either he could drink himself to death or go with the senior. And dying is scary so Mark chose the latter.

"Huh!"

"She apologized." Mark added as he ate a small bite from his sandwich then continued "Apparently she thinks of herself as the reason we are like this." A scoff left his lips with those words as if to mock the senior but honestly that was not his intention. If he were to mock someone, it would be himself because in the end everything is his own fault, isn't it?

"Mark…" Vee called out in a low voice still unsure if he should say anything at all or just listen. But he needed to say something, the guilt ate him more and more with every encounter with the junior. "I am sorry, I want to say more but I have nothing else to say but sorry. I know I messed everything up but…"

"But you don't know anything P'." Mark interrupted, "Not about the sleepless nights, the pitiful stares, the therapy sessions. You don't know anything."

The words froze the senior as if his soul had been sucked out and he just stared at the boy, lips agap in order to speak but he said nothing. There was nothing to say as he really didn't know anything.

"And the fact that I am not even mad at you. I just can't forget." 

"It was that bad hm." 

"But it's true that I still love you." Mark spoke and the words once again left Vee in confusion. Does it mean they have a chance? Can they start over? even with these thoughts racing in his mind, he dare not ask them. It would make things worse and he knew it so he waited for the other to finish as he took a sip of his cold drink.

Mark quietly started munching on his food after dropping that bomb. So he loves the Vee but what should Vee do now? Should he confess too or should he change the topic? 

"That's what I like." Vee didn't have to think much as the junior finally spoke but his words were so out of context, making the other so confused that his head visibly tilted to the side. "I mean the way you act all high but are so easily flustered." He elaborated with a smile plastered on his face but Vee who could have died to see that smile was having a hard time containing his delight.

"Can I have just one chance?" He couldn't handle it anymore. His brain was scolding him for his stupidity but his heart was also scolding him for his rationality. So he chose rational stupidity if that makes any sense. The question itself held so much longing and wasn't the first time he had asked. He knew he had been rejected before but he needed to try again.

"There you go again." Mark said almost soullessly and it broke Vee's heart to see those colourless eyes. "Talking about love, longing and chances. That's too fictional P'."

"Then tell me what I should be doing because I really don't know."

"I already told you that you can't do anything." 

"Mark" the seriousness in Vee's voice caught Mark's attention as he let go of the glass in his hand and looked at the senior. "I really want you to let go of your feelings for me, I am not asking you to come back to me. I love you and that fact won't change but it's also a fact that I hurt you and have no right to be with you." Mark listened to those words so tently as if his brain couldn't process them. 

"But you keep hurting yourself by holding onto something that shouldn't be there. I keep trying to leave you alone but you keep ending up like this every time I do. So what am I supposed to do?" At the end the frustration was visibly in Vee's voice and he really was frustrated, this whole situation was nothing but frustrating.

"You are lecturing me now." Mark said in a low, sulking voice that the other man couldn't understand.

"I am lecturing but you can't keep doing this. Like earlier, how much did you drink?"

"A lot," Mark replied with a smile and Vee didn't know why the younger one would be happy about that.

"Exactly! That's bad" Vee felt like he was trying to reason with a child which he knew was not the case. Either the alcohol was still messing with Mark's system or he was trying to mess with Vee. 

"P'Vee" This time Mark's voice held a certain amount on seriousness in it so Vee stopped listening to his conflicting thoughts and focused on the boy whose words just put him in more conflict "should we try and be friends?" He asked as if he himself was not sure about the answer but it sounds like a good solution. "Wouldn't that solve a lot of things?"


note:
My mind is a mess so this chapter is also a mess but I will try to edit it also I just realized I made it as Mark had changed his dorm room but earlier it was not like that so I'll just assume that Vee felt nostalgia the first time cause his room was decorated the same way.😅

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