Vee's POV
"It's all your fault P'" The words echoed in my brain as I subconsciously dragged myself out of the bar behind the drunk junior.
I walked behind the drunk figure but still made sure to not get too close. I just wanted to make sure that the boy gets back safely. My stupid self still being beyond worried about the person who had turned his back to me many time now but right now the only option was to watch from a distance.
It hurts, knowing you can't go on without something and you have that essential thing in front of your eyes but you still can't reach it, it really hurts.
I whip the tears that fell on my face before looking back at Mark who had stopped walk and leaned against a wall and my concerns for him were proven right when he slump down to the ground.
I sighed as I walk close to him to find the boy sleeping and my logic urges me to call his friends but when have I ever followed logic so I chose to pick him up and drag him to his dorm myself.
"Mark, where are the keys?" I asked when we stopped in front of a familiar door. A door that I shouldn't dare to cross but do I have any other option right now?
'of course I do' I shrug away that last thought before checking the pockets on Mark's jacket since he never replied to me.
As soon as the door opened and we entered the familiar space, the tears that were urging to fall, did so as the nostalgia hit me. It is not the same room but it is decorated the same, giving off the vibe of a place I know too well. I wished to be back here for so long as this place held so many memories for me but now that I was here I felt sad, knowing that I no longer belong here.
I placed Mark on his bed and just fall to the ground at his bed side, no longer having any strength in my leg. I never wanted us to end up like this, never wanted us to fall apart from each other, so much that we can't even greet the other anymore. I wanted this to end, wanted us to stop hurting but in the end we keep hurting each other.
"I know it's all my fault." I said trying to whip the tears that won't stop falling "then why do you keep thinking about me and hurting yourself." I murmured softly as I slid closer to the sleeping boy only to focus on his eyes that were staring at me. (Reading it now, it sound creepy but I am still gonna keep it that way)
"You are awake?" I said in a questioning manner as I move away from him.
"Hmm" Mark only hummed before shifting to lay on his back. He seemed to be awake but didn't say anything, didn't even tell me to get out. I guess he is still drunk.
"I think I should leave then." I said before standing up, still not willing to leave but this is not something I can do by my will anymore, I can't stay here so I walk away from the bed and towards the door.
"Can you get me some water?" My feet froze at the voice and my brain couldn't process a simple question that was being asked. Can I? is this just a casual request? or does that mean I can stay? I turned and confusingly looked at Mark who was now sitting up but he only made a stern face devoid of any expressions so I just mouthed a 'sure' and walked inside the kitchen.
I walked out of the kitchen with a glass of water and gave it to Mark. He was silent again and so I also didn't dare to say anything. I just stared in anticipation as he gulp down the water, waiting for him speak or at least tell me to leave so I can let go of the hope that I am still clinging onto but he didn't say anything so I decided to break the thick wall of silence that had enveloped the air.
"Are you Okay?" I asked the junior once he was done drinking his water.
"Hmm"
"Do you want something else?" He didn't reply and just shook his head from side to side.
"Okay I will leave then" I said as I turned around and gestured to walk but a voice stopped me from moving once again.
"P'Vee" Mark called out. I turned around to look at the boy and was shocked to see him with teary eyes.
"What's wrong?" I asked as I rushed over to him and rubbed his teary face with my thumb, panicking and not knowing what I should do but I didn't have time to process as Mark had leaned forward and kissed me, making my whole being freeze once again.
I had longed for this warmth for so long, I don't want it stop but it needs to stop or he might hate me even more when he realize what happened. 'He is only doing it because he is drunk so I need to stop this right?' I thought before slightly pushing him by his shoulders so that our faces are at least a centimeter away.
"Don't do that" I told before moving further away from him
"Why?" he asked
"Because you'll regret it later if you do."
"I know I always regret everything but I just have to forget it just like you did" He said in a void tone making my tears fall again as I know what he meant by that.
"But it's more regretful if you forget." I replied trying to explain myself, trying to explain how I had felt all this time.
Mark went silent again but this time the silence was overshadowed but the little sobs that left him mouth. The boy I loved was crying and all I could do was helplessly watch him do so but I failed to control myself as I hugged him which he surprisingly returned but didn't stop crying.
"Mark" I called out to gain his attention once he had calmed down which I get as he hummed so I spoke again "Can we stop hurting now?"
please do tell me what you think about this as I am still not sure if how I am writing this. Also thanks for reading.
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FanfictionI gave you a chance only to be broken again what do you expect me to do now? This is the sequel to my first love mechanics FF