Growing Fires with Old Ashes

Prologue

Atlas.

You will kiss her tonight Atlas. Fucks sake, no matter how many times I whisper that to myself, I can't fucking bring myself up to do it. Confessing to her would be awkward and she'll probably laugh in my face. A kiss on the other hand, would be quick, easy and she'd know right away that I'm in love with her.. right?

A  brief breeze passes me as I'm standing in Sages's garden, looking right up to her window where a dim light is coming through her thin curtains. It's not the first time I've come to her home to sneak up to her room. Just because her parents have some sort of shit curfew for guests coming by.

Sighing deeply and cursing underneath my breath, I take a step forward to her downspout. While climbing up to her window, I trip a couple times but luckily I manage to keep myself on my feet. Of course, I have to be the gentleman that climbs up to my best friend's window. Why can't she climb up to mine?

Finally, I arrive at her window, shoving myself through the small opening as I land right onto my ass. Sage starts laughing at the sight of me laying on her floor as I groan loudly.

''The fuck you laughing at, thanks for helping me up by the way'' rolling my eyes, I get up and lay down on Sage's bed.

''What took you so long, hm? Was your mom reading you a bedtime story?'' she teased. Funny, I was actually overthinking about kissing you tonight.

''Yeah, she read Beauty and the Beast for me tonight'' I laughed, causing her to shake her head as she stood up to push the curtains aside.

We always watched the stars at night, mainly because we were both obsessed with astrology. We sat down beside each other, staring out of her window. The light of the moon was bright, landing right onto her delicate skin.

Sage kept talking about this specific thing but I couldn't pay attention to whatever the hell she was saying. God, she was beautiful. Her features were even more stunning while the moonlight shone down onto her. Dimples covered her cheeks, her lips which I wanted to kiss all too badly, her chestnut brown hair which she had shoved into a quick ponytail. I've dropped so many signs about me being in love with her but I don't think she's noticed.

It's just a kiss. Atlas, get the balls for it and just kiss her. This kiss could either ruin our friendship forever or it could lead to me calling Sage my girlfriend. Praying for the second option.

My palms started becoming sweaty, I rubbed the back of my neck as Sages' head suddenly snapped in my direction, almost making me shit myself.

''You okay?''

Sage.

''Uh, yeah, what were you saying again?'' he asked, trying to act casual.

I laugh. He's been acting weird today, actually, he's been acting weird ever since our last sleepover. Like half a year ago or so.

''I was talking about Mr Evans being a prick about me handing my assignment in late'' I answered as he nodded. It was silent again. He was avoiding any eye contact with me as I laid my hand on his cheek, lifting his face up to meet mine.

''You look pale, Atlas. Are you sure you're okay?'' I asked again, his lip was trembling slightly as he looked straight into my eyes. I probably looked like I had a big ass question mark on my forehead. He was being so confusing.

Before I could add something to my sentence, he had his lips against mine. I froze, not knowing what to do nor how to react. What the hell was I supposed to do?! Kiss him back? I'm sure he just took my first kiss.

I've never felt an attraction to Atlas in that way, he's always been just my best friend whom I've known ever since we were kids. Because of this kiss, it was obvious he liked me.. how was I supposed to tell him I was leaving tomorrow?

I tried to move my lips a bit but I could feel I wasn't the only one who was tensed. He had both his hands on my cheeks, caressing my skin softly and before the kiss could turn into a make-out session, I shoved him away from me.

The look on his face was slightly heart wrenching. Hurt filled his eyes as he stood up, shaking his head. It looked like he wanted to slap himself.

''You need to leave'' that was the only thing I could get out of my mouth. I couldn't face him now and tell him about my departure tomorrow. Not after he just kissed me. I wasn't even sure how to feel about it. All I knew now was that he had to get out.

''Sage-'' ''No, Atlas I need some time'' I immediately snapped at him. Okay maybe I shouldn't be so harsh on him but my emotions were all over the place now.

He stared at his feet as he then looked up, his eyes meeting mine as he shortly nodded. I could clearly see him being embarrassed about it all, I didn't mean to make him feel embarrassed. This kiss just made it even more difficult to leave him behind.

''I'm sorry, Sage'' he mumbled. I nodded, not saying a word.

He sighed and pushed the window open. He stood on the ledge of my window, looking down at the garden as I saw him doubt about something. He then looked at me. The expression in his eyes already made me feel like I was going to cry. ''Please text me, tomorrow, in a few days. I don't care but just give me a text'' he said as I nodded. ''I will. Goodnight Atlas'' he shot me one last look before climbing back downstairs.

God Atlas.. why did you have to make things even more difficult than they already were?

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Hi everyone! Welcome to our first book ever!

We're so excited for this story and we hope you guys are as well! Hopefully, you'll enjoy reading this story as much as we enjoyed writing it.

This book contains mature themes, including: violence, 18+ scenes, alcohol, drug use and death. In case there are any triggering subjects in a chapter, we will make sure to give a trigger warning before reading.

This book will also have various languages in most of its chapters. The 3 of us aren't that experienced with the languages contained in this book, so if you were to find any mistakes. Feel free to let us know! We'd love to receive any feedback from our readers.

We won't keep you waiting any longer. Have fun!

F, A & M <3