50 Photos

Chapter 30: Is this love?

Throw as many hate comments as you want at the end of the chapter.

Also, this chapter will be VERY long.

Mikasa's POV:

" So here's the first photo of me and Conny," Sasha said, as she lifted it up to Eren and Levi's faces. " Wait did you guys take all 50 photos?" Eren questioned Sasha.

" No, we didn't. Even if we did, I'm pretty sure most of the photos we took were bad. We kind of rushed." Conny nervously laughed. He was right, we did rush. Especially me and Armin. I honestly don't like this project. Out of anything else we could have gotten as a first unit we got photography. And taking photos is not really my cup of tea.

I sighed and turned around to look at Armin. Once when he realized my eyes were on him he looked up from his camera and stared back at me. " These turned out horrible." The blonde stated bluntly. He lazily lowered the camera he was holding. " huh?" I questioned him.

" When I say they look horrible. I meant the photos with only you inside them." He yet again stated bluntly. Offended by his words I quickly snatched the camera out of his hands. " What do you mean they look bad?" I questioned him again. I looked at the photos that he mentioned were 'bad'. My thumb was scrolling left to see each photo.

And, I can't lie he wasn't fully wrong. In a few of the photos Armin took of me my head was turned, causing the camera lens to not have a focused image of me, so it was a bit blurred. " What the hell were you looking at Mikasa... If you weren't so distracted these could have come out right. And, I know you hate this unit. I do too. But, can we at least try and get an A on it." Armin groaned. " Well... I uh..." I said, wondering how to respond to him. " just tell me what got you so distracted." Armin muttered.

What exactly got me so distracted... I thought to myself. Well, I guess I already know the answer to that... But, I'm just too stubborn and embarrassed to really want to say it. I don't know how to feel about Eren anymore. I'm so scared to confess only to get rejected. Because I know my love for him is unrequited. And, it hurts so bad... The pocky game. I can't stop thinking about it. If Armin didn't goddamn choose me and him. But, I know he did it as a favor but It wasn't the right time. And, that little shit game showed me how much he sees me as just a sister and nothing more. He loves me as a sister and nothing more... And, now whenever I see him with Levi I just... I can't explain it. I just feel angry and jealous. I just don't understand it anymore. I just can't understand myself anymore. I just don't know-how.

It's as if all my feelings have been swelled up into a pot mixed with jealousy, anger, paranoia, and sadness.

Maybe I wouldn't feel the feelings I have if you didn't tell me those kind words that day... At the piano showcase when we were younger... Maybe I wouldn't have fallen in love with you. Maybe I wouldn't have to deal with this feeling of unrequited love in my heart.

" Mikasa!" Armin shouted, making me get thrown out of my thoughts. I gasped and looked over at him. Was he trying to get my attention this whole time? Was I that deep into my thoughts that I ignored him? I wondered.

" Sorry." I whispered

The blonde sighed before saying " No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I was pressuring you into giving me a response to the question I asked. And, I was being rude to you about how the photos came out... Sure some of them were a bit blurred and bad, but that doesn't mean we can't do retakes! We did do a good job with our group photos. That should be good enough. Right?" The blonde beamed. I smiled at his words and gave him the camera back. " That's true," I replied with a nod.

" I think they look nice. I like the poses you guys did." I heard Eren's voice from a distance.

I looked over my shoulder and saw him talking to Sasha with a small smile that tattered his lips. Meanwhile, Levi, looked like he was in deep thought and didn't utter a word.