secret benefits // bucky barnes x female reader

-28

3 days passed. bucky was avoiding you completely. no talking. no staring. no arguing. no making out. no sex. nothing. you were starting to miss him. he was right, you wouldn't survive without him. your nightmares were getting better but now they are just worse again.

it pissed you off so much that he was right, again. you needed him and you don't even know why. you were missing all the cuddling and how safe you felt in his arms.

you've realized that you needed to stop. if y'all aren't in a relationship or don't even like each other then you shouldn't think about him like that and especially don't miss him. you decided to call marcus to distract yourself.
fuck i'm using him again.

he picked up the phone and greeted you. you told him how much you've missed him and he did too. he was telling you about how beautiful california is and that it's sad that he needed to leave soon but he's happy that he's gonna see you again. y'all were talking for a while and then hung up.

do i really miss him? or do i just miss the attention i'm not getting from bucky anymore?

as soon as you hung up the thoughts filled up your mind again. you decided to go for a walk. you went out of your room and saw bucky leaving his room too.
well this is awkward. the both of you went into the elevator and did not say a single word to each other. he didn't even look at you.

you arrived downstairs and made yourself an iced coffee. you said goodbye to everyone and headed out with your drink.

of course the walk wasn't the best idea. it wouldn't distract you from your thoughts.

why was i even refusing bucky's kisses? was it because of this weird feeling i get when i kiss him? and i wanted to refuse the feelings? why is he even acting like that just because i don't wanna admit that i've never felt anything between us? did i even feel anything? yes definitely. NO. no definitely not.

it was getting late and you just watched the sunset. the beautiful sunset gave you a clear mind. it was calming and you were just sitting on a bench next to a fountain, admiring it. while admiring it you suddenly saw a figure sitting on the brench on the opposite of you. you couldn't see who it clearly was because of the fountain. soon enough, you saw the person. it was a man.
it was bucky.

was he following me? you decided to act like you didn't see him to see what he does. he didn't do anything. he didn't even move one time. it was getting darker so you wanted to leave, not caring about bucky, but still finding it weird. you stood up and walked away. a few minutes after, you looked back and saw that bucky was gone. this is so strange.

you arrived at the tower and saw loki on the couch so you sat beside him. you chatted with him for a while, for a very long while, until you both started to get tired. you yawned a hundred times in the middle of the conversation, loki as well.
"i think we should go to sleep. it's late and tomorrow is the party" loki nodded at your suggestion and stood up to leave to his room.

as soon as you reached your floor, the elevator doors open and bucky stood in front of you. you were thinking about talking to him for a quick second but you pushed away the thought and passed him very quickly. you went inside your room, pressed your back against the door and sighed heavily. you stood there for a few seconds, thinking about if you should've talked to him.

you laid down on your bed and looked at the time. 9:08pm. it was still early for you since you always go to bed after 11pm but you still were tired and exhausted. you wanted to sleep since you were tired as hell but you just couldn't. you felt lonely. you needed somebody on your side. you missed him.

you decided to go down again and train a bit so you could get even more tired. you were training for 30 minutes now and it really didn't help. you were more awake now and not more tired. but you didn't stop. an hour later and you couldn't stand on your feet anymore. your legs and arms were shaking from all the training since you didn't have a single break. you heard a little sarcastic chuckle from the corner and as you looked over you saw bucky. he was pissing you off so much at the moment. he just casually walked out of the training hall as you laid there completely out of breath with shaking legs. (they weren't really shaking. it was more like a vibration, if you know what i mean..)

you were too tired to think so you didn't think about why bucky was stalking you in the training hall that much, but it still confused you. you couldn't even get up and fell asleep on the mattress in the training hall.

a/n: sorry, this one was very short.