Who I Am With You

Chapter 24

After I do a quick check on all the pastures in my jeep, making sure no other horses were injured last night, I join the morning meeting. Soon, the room will be full again every morning, when Lisa, Will, and Ian are all back down for the remaining days of summer.   

I'm surprised when I find Natalie curled up on a old on horse blanket in Marmalade's stall when I enter the barn, but not too surprised. The girl loves her horse. I don't want to startle her, so I call her name softly. She stirs and rubs both eyes, yawning.  

"Good morning, Natalie. Looks like you had a long night."  

"Yeah. I just wanted to make sure she was ok. She hasn't looked up from her hay in hours. Just been eating away. So I think she feels good." Natalie's voice is rough from sleep.   

"That's a good sign."   

"Marmie, Dr. Jamie is here to see you this morning," Natalie grins at her horse.   

"Hey, I'm no doctor. Don't get her expectations up too high." I laugh.   

Natalie gets to her feet and we work together to get Marmalade taken care of. Natalie mixes up her feed and meds while I remove the dressing and replace it with new.   

"How does it look?" Natalie asks me.   

"Looks ok. It's going to take a while to heal, but I think it will close up just fine."  

"That's a relief."  We stand together and watch the little dun nibble at her food.  

"I'm starving. Do you want to come up to the house for breakfast? Devon and I are heading back home tonight, and mom goes all out for breakfast on goodbye days." One side of her mouth turns up in a smile at her good fortune.   

"Thank you, but I'm ok. I already ate this morning," I say.  

"So? You can eat again."   

I laugh at her, "I'm supposed to be working."  

"Ross won't care!"   

"You're not going to let me go are you?" I accuse her playfully. 

"No. I really want you to have breakfast with us." She easily admits.   

"Alright then. Doesn't look like I have much choice," I shake my head, but give her a little smile. I follow Natalie to her car and wonder what Ian would think about me going up to his parent's house for breakfast. 

I feel like I'm overstepping some boundaries here, but Natalie is insistent, and I get the impression that she is used to getting her way, so I acquiesce.   

"Jamie, I'm glad Natalie brought you. We have a lot of food that needs eating. Please, help yourself." Mrs. Simmons greets me warmly. Devon emerges from the living room and gives Natalie a quick kiss.  

"How is your horse?" He asks.  

"She's on the mend. Jamie did a great job getting her patched up." Natalie says. 

"I'm glad to hear she's doing alright." 

"Poor old Marmalade." Mrs. Simmons hangs her head. 

"Its all Snapper's fault." Natalie accuses.  

"Nat, don't go blaming your sister's horse. You don't know what happened."  Mrs. Simmons chides her softly. 

"I'm sure it was Snapper. Snapper is so mean. That's why the damned old horse's name is snapper!"  

 I can't help but laugh at them.   

"Snapper is so slow getting around these days, Natalie, I hardly think the old boy could catch your little mare." Mr. Simmons joins us in the kitchen, squeezing his youngest daughter's shoulder.   

"I don't care what y'all say about poor, old, slow Snapper. He's a menace. Always has hated Marmie. And she's never done anything to him."   

"Snapper's not a menace." Mrs. Simmons shakes her head.  

We all sit down and pass plates of sausage and biscuits around until everyone's plates are full. I'm in a state of shock that I am eating with Ian's family as though I am one of them. They include me in their conversation and make me feel a part of their circle. Even his father is congenial towards me.  

"Jamie, I'm glad I got to spend a little time with you." Natalie starts after everyone has left the table.   

"You too."   

"How long have you and E been seeing each other?"   

"Not very long at all, honestly." I don't even know exactly how long it has been. When do I start counting from? I'm not sure.   

"It was kind of a big deal that he brought you to the cookout." She mentions. 

"I thought you guys knew he was bringing me, but evidently he didn't tell you." I blush, remembering all their stares.   

"We don't care." She waves that off, "It's just that E hasn't brought anyone around in a long time, so he must really like you. I don't know if you realize that yet or not." She pauses and holds my eyes for a moment, "You may be in deeper than you think."   

I am realizing that. 

"He told me about...Lyndsey." I don't know why I feel like I should whisper or why her name feels sacred coming from my lips.   

"Really? Wow." Natalie looks shocked.   

"Yeah," I draw the word out, not knowing what else to say.   

"He's had a rough time with that. We were all beginning to think he'd never come to terms with it. He's been with other girls since Lyndsey died, don't think poorly of him for that, he's a guy, but you're the first he's shown any real interest in. And I can see why. You seem like a really nice person. And I guess all I am trying to say is, I hope he means as much to you as you do to him."   

 "Thanks, and yeah. I really like him too." My response seems inadequate to me, but Natalie's smile widens showing her pearly teeth.   

"I know this is weird, but I'm glad we talked about it." Natalie says, "He deserves to be happy again."  

Yes. "He does."   

I help Natalie clear the table and then she gives me a ride back down to the barn.   

"Take good care of Marmie for me." She hugs me. I hug her back and promise her I will. She leaves me her cell phone number to call her with updates whenever I can, and then she heads back up to the house to spend a little more time with her family as her visit draws to a close. 

Natalie made a point to make sure she told me what she needed to say when she had the opportunity. Somehow her words carry more weight knowing that. I feel like I'm under even more pressure not to disappoint Ian.