Lusting for you-completed

Chapter 34

The car ride back to the city was mostly quiet with a sullen and pouty Lucian sitting beside me.  I couldn't help my constant peeks in his direction. He was always so beautiful to look at but sullen and pouty gave him something undeniable. A pensive reflection that was too deep to be true. But it appealed all the same.

"You could say something ypu you know," I suggested mildly.  It was after all a long drive ahead. 

"I want to stop hurting you, " he said surprisingly.  I stared at him in amazement.

"I don't understand. You don't hurt me," I murmured soothingly.  He was scaring me by talking this way.

"You know that is not true.  All I seem to do is hurt you. I always have and likely always will," I said matter-of-factly.

I reached out immediately to grip his hand in mine. I didn't like him thinking this way. I was his. His to do with as he saw please and if that meant a little bit of hurt then that was alright by me. I was fine by it. I was more than fine damnit. I was happy!

Now how do I go about saying all that to him without sounding like a complete loon. I reached out instead to grip his hand tightly in my own.  I felt so possessive about him at this moment that I was gritting my teeth to stop myself from doing anything stupid.

Stupid like pulling over the car on the side of this remote and less travelled road and having my way with ravishing him. Only the knowledge that he would kill me in the process stopped me. Not for fear of  dying but of what it would do to him if he caused my death.

I needed to do something before I became really mad. I spent the rest of the way thinking about it.  I did manage to come up with what I considered a reasonable plsn of action but first I had to get us both back to Lucian's house in one piece and that as always proved the hardest achievement yet.

But I tapped on the music and turned the channel at every romantic tune that threatened to flood the car.  Then I even resolutely prevented my mind from drifting along the lines of Lucian naked in the water with my hand gripping his tight arse.

Oh god!

That was surely the hardest.  It didn't help matters either knowing that Lucian knew exactly what I was thinking the entire trip home for he felt me as intimately as he felt himself.  Especially in this closed quarters. There was no escaping my reaction to his proximity and his reading of that reaction. Like an unbreakable circuit my lust for him kept on feeding at the invisible fires between us till I was acutely concious of every breath I took and of his every breath too.

Then finally we were there and I was turning into the last road that led up to his home. Lucian opened the door and fled from the moving vehicle without preamble.  I almost slammed my brakes in shock but recalled just in time he was nearly invincible.

In fact the only thing that I knew could kill him was me.