The Patchwork Heart

Chapter 2

After that party, Dex and I were inseparable. He doted on me constantly. He treated me well and cared about my feelings and needs. Dex was the ideal boyfriend, really. I wish I could say there was a bunch of things we fought about but really, being in a relationship with him was easy. As the years past, we only grew closer.

I wore his hockey jacket all the time, in any weather. I went to all his games with Jessica. I cheered him on and rooted for him every step of the way. Dex adored me as much as I adored him. When I finally agreed to have sex with him for the first time it was slow and gentle. He took great care with me, as he knew it was my first time. He told me he loved me over and over again and made sure I was as comfortable as possible. Dex was a very sweet boyfriend. Afterward he remained affectionate and loving. Sex didn't make him turn away from me, if anything he became more attentive.

My parents loved him. Dex was always willing to help out around the store, loading and unloading boxes. He and my dad bonded over sports and Dex became a fixture at our place during the hockey playoffs. His family was equally welcoming to me. We all started gathering for Thanksgiving and Easter dinners as one large family. It was very easy and comfortable. Even Dex's older brother, Mitchell warmed up to me after a while. He was five years older then us. Mitch had decided to stay home and farm with his dad instead of going on to school. He was a nice guy at heart, but Mitch wasn't as charming as Dex. He didn't say the right thing very often, which was the main reason why he was chronically single. Dex loved to tease his big brother about it, which often lead to rough housing. I did my best to be kind of Mitch, which he seemed to appreciate.

For my seventeenth birthday, Dex got me a promise ring. It was a small white gold band with two hearts intertwined together. In the middle of each heart were small diamonds. When I opened the box, I was shocked, "Dex, this is beautiful."

He smiled and kissed me softly, as we parted he whispered, "This is the promise of a future. I'm going to marry you one day, Bree Kendell. I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy." When he told me that I moved my lips over his frantically. I remember we were in the cab of his truck and there wasn't a lot of room, but we managed to make love with gusto. It was the happiest moment of my life at that point. I had everything I had ever wanted, I was completely wrapped up in this boy who promised me everything he had. It was romantic, sweet, young love and I adored the way it made me feel.

When it was time for my senior year, I had become a love-sick young woman. I wasn't sure if I was going to go to post-secondary or not but I knew I wanted to be where Dex was. He had consumed my entire life; I didn't realize at the time how unhealthy that was. I was the envy of every girl in our school because I was his girlfriend, and I loved it. My entire identity was wrapped up in him, who I was to him and where I was going with him. It never occurred to me to make my own plans or have my own goals. I was Dex Leys' girlfriend, his future wife, that was all that mattered to me.

Until that terrible day in June, 2014. My entire world fell apart around me. It felt like my reason for living was gone, it had died with Dex. I loved him so completely, it was all consuming. When he died, a part of me wished he would have taken me with him. I didn't come out of my room for three days after I got the news. Friends tried to come and visit me but my parents sent them away. I was in no shape to see people. I still don't remember the funeral clearly. I went with my parents and sat with Dex's family, but I don't remember what the minister said about him. I don't remember the eulogy his father gave or the prayers his coaches made. All I remember was staring at the giant picture of Dex in his football uniform up set up on the table with the urn that held his ashes. I remember that when he got that picture taken, he had been smiling at me. There were so many people at the funeral they had to hold the gathering afterward at the hockey rink.

My mom and dad had put me down at a table and sat with me the entire time. People I didn't know kept coming up to me to tell me how sorry they were. It was exhausting and soul crushing. The tears streamed down my face like constant rivers. I couldn't stop them and I didn't try to. I didn't hear a word anyone said to me, I just stared into endless face and nodded. I accepted their condolences wordlessly. That day never seemed to end, it went on forever. Little did I know it was only the beginning of my heartache.