Scar

Where he sleeps

Finally we get to go home. It's been a long day and the alpha says we are welcome to stay the night but Scar doesn't even let him finish the offer before declining. He's so fed up with celebration plans that I fear he might run into the woods and never come back. 

As the quiet comes over us in the car I ponder the day's events. It's unusual for me to be surprised by other wolves' friendliness. Dana was very kind even thoguh she didn't really understand me. 

My eyes stick to Scar. I see his face in profile. His wild features are pretty in an odd way. It's like his emotions are too wild to be contained by a simple face but at the same time he looks so soft when he's calm. The windows get foggy by our breaths and the cold outside is as stark as our silence. 

I scratch my head and one last purple little flower falls down into my lap. He darts a sideway glance to see what it is. Blush spread over my cheeks and I pick it up quickly. 

"It's from your mother's garden" I explain quietly, knowing that boys shouldn't wear flowers. But the others said I was pretty in them, maybe... 

"I hope it's not for your head" he mutters with his eyes planted far down the road. So much for softness.

"That's not up to me" I murmur and turn to stare out the window. The night has made the forest shadows grow large and thick. 

"It would be if you ever bit back" he snaps at me as if I'm some weak idiot who can't fend for myself. An electric bolt sizzles in my chest. I want to tell him that he's wrong, that I'm strong in my own way, but in reality I believe him. He's right, I am just a pathetic idiot. 

I don't show him how much the comment hurts but I'm sure he knows. He likes to be mean. 

To my surprise he doesn't take me home. We stop infront of his little house just out of town. The trees around are old and tall and the shadows seem to loom even longer here. A perfect place for one full of darkness. 

"I can't let you stay at home in case it happens again" he grumbles as if it's the most annoying thing he's ever had to deal with. "Get out." 

I follow him causiously into the green little house. The lights are off and he doesn't turn them on so I can't really tell how it looks, but it smells like him, like a cold misty mountain far away but also like a newly burnt fire of cozy warmth. I wish I didn't love his scent so much. I wish it didn't make me long for more. 

When he leads me into the only bedroom I stop dead in my tracks. This is where he sleeps. My stomach turns into ice cold jelly. Oh no.

"Where do you want me to sleep?" I squeak, ignoring that I sound like an idiot asking what color the sky is. We've slept in the same bed in the alpha's mansion many times. Somehow I'm anxious to sleep next to him today. After what Dana said I'm starting to feel like maybe it's my fault that Scar is so cold. If I wasn't so scared then... 

"On the bed, on the floor, you think I care?!" he answers dryly. I swallow the excessive amount of saliva in my mouth and put my bag on the floor. No, I won't let him distance himself. Maybe I can make things better between us. 

"What will you do if... if it happens?" I bravely ask him with my voice still shaky and pathetic. Some part of me is scared of his darkness but another part deep within wants to know if he would show me affection. If he could be kind. He glowers at me meanly. 

"Nothing, because you'll fix it on your own." The grey eyes glimmer in the dark shadows over his face. The scar looms over his aggrivated features. I can feel myself starting to shake. I just have to show him I'm not scared. 

"W-what if you can't control yourself?" I studder and lower my eyes trying to look unaffected. A soft, soft growl rumbles in his throat but it's so quiet I almost miss it. Oh no. 

"Don't worry, I wouldn't touch you even if my life depended on it" he hisses angrily. I dare not move a single muscle, afraid that it will show how much the comment hurts. He tosses his bag onto the floor, making me flinch. With a growl he storms out of the room and slams the door, leaving me trembling and hurting.