Scar

Of all places

Elmer's POV

I close my eyes and focus on the bond, on the feeling connecting me to him, on all the painful things that has happened and the difficult things I've found out. My heart beats like a little hummingbird as I search for him. I don't see the memories exactly but I can feel them, squished together into a painful little path I have to walk down again. 

The closer I get the darker it becomes. Tall figures seem to shape in front of me. The compact black forms into trees and into a dark forest. In this shadow world of his I see the little lake close to my family home. Of all places... 

It's the place where we first met. I see a little boy hiding under a tree. I rewatch our first meeting with horror. The black wolf slips out of the shadows and they meet. It's not as quick as I remember it. 

The wolf stares at the little boy for an eternity before he reaches out his little hand to touch the matte fur. A smile spreads on his lips as the kid hugs the wolf and nuzzles his head into its neck. The wolf sits down and they spend at least half an hour just cuddling, the kid playing with the wolf's fur and him happily waving his tail and smiling. 

It's not until they lock eyes for the second time that the wolf becomes anxious. He backs away and shakes his head and snorts as if to get a difficult smell out of his nose. With panic he looks at the little boy and trots further away. 

Little me reaches out his hand for him but the wolf turns away ready to leave but the boy lets out a little yelp. It's a small sound, something between a cry and breath but the wolf cannot walk away from that. 

He circles the boy again and rubs his head against his cheek before slowly giving in and softly wrapping his jaw around his neck. 

I didn't remember it like this. 

But I can feel him now. He is not at the lake but he is not too far. I can tell he is in a lot of doubt. I can feel his anguish. It is clouding his mind, making him punish himself for everything he has done. 

I thought I would feel good that he is suffering but instead I am just sad that he is hurting so much over something that he is constantly fighting. 

If only I would have known about this earlier... then I could have... I don't know what I would have done if I had known earlier. Maybe I could have helped him. Mostly i just wish he hadn't destroyed our bond by hurting me. 

Well apparently the bond is still intact, but our relationship is still a ruin of pain and lies so nothing has changed. Only, I feel that it has. 

I open my eyes and turn to Simon. "I know where he is" I say and wonder if my voice sounds as shaky as I think it does. 

The cliff by the ravine is not a place anyone visits anymore. I remember the pack going there once a few years after Matthew died to mourn. I barely remember it but Simon bolts off suddenly wolf again and Nala follows. 

"Come back to pay me if you survive" the witch calls after them and then she looks at me. "If you change your mind and want to try to save him, here." She places a cold knife in my hand. Draw runes on his wrists, and then stab him in the heart. If he survives it, the seal might hold. It depends on how much he will let his fear control him. It is what drives the dark, what makes it strong" she explains, vaguely. 

I nod but I don't understand anything. Runes? What runes? Stab him in the heart? Fear? 

I run as fast as I can to catch up with them and Simon tells me thorugh the link how to get there. I am already tired from running but I have this wierd feeling that I cannot shake.