Love & Disquietude

Therapist Friend

being the therapist friend is tiring to say the least

I'm a people pleaser

I will go out of my way to make sure you're okay

mostly because I consider everyone else

before I can think about myself

but what about me?

I'll listen to your problems all day long

and give good advice that I won't take

but would you do the same for me?

I'm not saying I mind

I'm not saying I'd like to be in the spotlight

but for once

can't someone check up on me?

shoot me a text and just ask how I'm doing

without expecting an answer of "good, you"

though I'll say it anyway?

just once

I want to be the girl someone puts before anyone else

instead of the other way around.

even if that sounds selfish

I wish it were me

because the therapist friend is there whenever you need to talk

and you say you love them

because you know they can always make you feel better,

but you only really want me when it's convenient for you

and for the validation of your feelings.

i am cursed.

always the bridesmaid and never the bride 

why can't I be taken care of?

maybe if I were meaner

you wouldn't expect so much of me

and there would never be room for me to disappoint you

or myself