Sentiment of a Witness

𝙱𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚍 𝙼𝚘𝚘𝚗

Months wore on and nothing got better, nor did it get necessarily worse. Of course, it still felt like it was getting worse – I was spending every waking hour by my lonesome. And yes, I had usually spent most of my time by myself, but I had known my parents were there if I did want someone to talk to. Or if I wanted anything at all.

I enjoyed sitting by my window, looking at the world around me. I had never been let outside to play; my parents had always been heavily academically focused, believing that the only way to do well in life was through the power within. That power lay inside of your head, of course. They believed strongly in brainpower.

I began to notice more things too, some through the Gossamer and some through plain old observation. Such things included how old the Forest of Someher was, how the birds would call to each other and that the neighbouring children often went out to play late in the morning till mid-afternoon. I also realised how many neighbours we had – I knew the Simmons, I had heard vaguely of the Menkens, but I hadn't realised that the firey-headed girl from the doctors lived in the forest. Well, it's like my parents used to say, the longer you live, the more you know...

Yet, I still feel like the more you live, the more you know.

There was also another family I hadn't seen before. A tall girl with long, blonde hair was at least one of the kids there. Funny how we were all the same age, nearly as if we were supposed to be friends, but no, I doubted that the five other children even knew I existed, nonetheless, my name. My parents were also firm believers of the power of 'you' – you're not using someone else's brain to think, are you?

Before I knew it, there were only two months left until my seventh birthday. The past year felt like it had dragged on forever, yet it had gone in the blink of an eye.

As much as I had wished that I'd still be able to celebrate my birthday with my family, I knew and hoped that wouldn't be happening for a variety of reasons; for starters, my parents had avoided me for the past seven to nine months. Secondly, all this really started on my sixth birthday when I was properly introduced to the "wickedness" of Witnesses. And thirdly, I was beginning to feel as though this was, indeed, all my fault – I was the reason the only people I had ever loved turned their backs on me. I believed that anyone else I ever let in would find out about my knack and turn their back on me. So I didn't let anyone else in, well, at least not for a long time.

Those two months dragged on, though I didn't really notice – I was slowly growing accustomed to days flying by but hours feeling like they'd never pass. As you can probably guess, I spent the majority of this time in my room, out of the way, reading and watching the other kids play. Oh, how I began wishing I could join them.

It was the night of my seventh birthday when it happened - my parents called for me. I remember stressing out – what had I done? I hadn't broken any of their rules, which basically covered everything. Yet a part of me had hoped that maybe it was about my birthday... and once again, looking back, it was foolish. But I was just a small, innocent, naïve child – I didn't know any different.

There was only one thing I remembered about that day, and that was the screaming.

When I reached the door of my father's study, and all I could hear from inside, though slightly muffled, was the middle of an argument. My parents had a few in the past, but they'd always stop when they noticed me hiding away in the furthest point of the room. Their arguments had always frightened me – I didn't want to lose my family. Yet look where that has brought us.

I knew it was wrong, and I still regret it, but I crept closer to the door and pressed my ear against its cherry wood. I had the need to know what they were yelling about, what the problem was, and I had my suspicions.

"The boy is six, Arnold. We can't kick him out! If someone was to find out what happened, we'd be at risk of losing everything!"

"We're already starting to lose everything, Adira; he's just another problem at this point!" I heard my father say, sounding exasperated

"Ugh! Why did this have to happen to us..." my mother sounded as though she was on the verge of tears.

"I know, honey, but it'll get better. We just need to figure out what to do with... with John."

And that confirmed my suspicions. Why am I always the problem? Another burden I wish I didn't have to carry, but I did.

But it was what they said next that shocked me most...

"Could we... sell him? For his knack? We could get a fortune from that; we could even use some sort of memory or vow charm to make sure he can't say anything-"

"I mean, I suppose we could – it would solve all of our probl..."

Feeling the familiar prickling sensation from behind my eyes, I knew I didn't want to hear any more of it. I didn't need to hear any more of it. Were my parents really going to sell me?

I journeyed through the house, my head not leading me but rather my feet. Before I knew it, I found myself on the rooftop of the house. I had always found it calming, and the view was always breathtaking. I sat there for hours, not caring that my parents were probably still expecting me. With all my days spent indoors, I had forgotten how beautiful nature could be. I now consider it a birthday gift from my parents – forcing me to run outside and experience a natural beauty - a blood moon.

I ended up staying there all night, only falling asleep in the early hours of the morning, having realised that I had eavesdropped on my parents' conversation. That I had been nosy, just like a Witness. Was it my inner Witness peeking through? The thought made me sick. Or was it just normal, human curiosity?

The answer remained unclear for years.

And, oho, what a few, nightmarish years they were. 

Written - 19 May - 2 June, 2021

Published - 2 June, 2021

Chapter (sort of) inspired by the Lunar Eclipse on the 26th of May, and, have ya'll seen/heard about the fourth Nevermoor book?? It will be published in October, 2022 (too long to wait ;-;) is Silverborn: The Mystery of Morrigan Crow! AHHHH, I'm so excited! But it's a whole year and a bit to wait for it. ;-;