Dying to Breathe

6.1: schrodinger's cat

A/N: Finally figured out her voice :) Enjoy!

Chapter 6, Part 1: Schrodinger's Cat

"Do you ever wonder what it's like."

Penelope glanced over from where she sat on the floor, her homework sprawled over her lap as her sister lingered at the doorframe.

"What's what like?" Penelope pulled a strand of blonde hair behind her ear, watching as Millie twirled her dark hair around her finger with a thoughtful smile playing on her lips.

Millie's jade green eyes sparkled in the light of the small lamp on the dresser, flashing to Penelope's. Her lips slowly spread into a mischievous grin, "Dying."

Penelope stilled. The theme of the words wasn't uncommon coming from Millie's mouth, but it never failed to turn her blood cold in her veins.

She spoke slowly, watching how her sister waited patiently as she angled her head in a chilling, curious tilt (the same expression she'd wear whenever she found something deeply interesting), "I suppose it would be the worst thing one could experience in their lifetime."

Millie bit her lip, flames dancing in her eyes as she walked to Penelope's dresser, observing herself in the mirror over where her yearbooks sat. Penelope could practically see as her brain turned maniacally; her pulse visibly quickening as her face filled with colour. "How wonderful would it be if you could experience it without really disappearing forever?"

Penelope frowned, closing the textbook on her lap—long giving up on the possibility of studying that warm June night. "Millie... How could dying be fun?"

Millie shrugged, staring unblinkingly at herself in the mirror, only half of her face in the light—the other half shrouded in shadows; in the mysteries that she had become. "Because you'd feel so alive after dying. Maybe you'd become someone else entirely. A new life." She turned around, crouching down to Penelope's height before mirroring her crossed legs. She reached out, twirling a blonde string of hair, "L, what if you learned you were going to die?" She whispered, her green eyes practically penetrating Penelope's soul. "Perhaps even soon?"

Penelope swallowed the tightness in her throat, looking away from her inquisitory, excited gaze. She felt her body go through the motions as her brain swirled in thoughts—Millie was drowning again. She was being pulled under—seduced by dangerous thoughts.

She looked up, exhaling slowly, "What would you do if you learned you were going to die, Mil?"

Millie smiled, pushing the strand behind Penelope's ear, "That's simply impossible, L." She giggled, "Don't you know I will never die?"

Penelope bit her lip, her eyes flickering to Millie's—the darkness hiding any hidden emotion from her. Hiding any hidden meaning (not that they'd be written on her face anyways).

"But I will?" Penelope felt her heartrate rise as the words slipped out of her lips.

Millie's smile softened, her hand caressing Penelope's cheek almost lovingly. She didn't say anything as they stared at one another—as if communicating to one another using twin telepathy. Only, Penelope had never been able to do that—get inside of Millie's head. But Millie could get into her head. She could get into anyone's—just like she knew every word and thought that flowed through Penelope's mind in that moment as she locked her eyes on her and refused to let her go.

"That depends on your definition of dying." Millie finally spoke, releasing her as she glanced over her shoulders, "Dead but living." She purred, scrunching her nose up a moment later. "Like Schrodinger's cat."

Penelope shook her head, "So what are you saying?" She joked with a strained laugh, "You're going to put me in a box and never open it?"

Millie's facial expression dropped—a blank look smoothing out her face as she leaned into Penelope's space. She grabbed Penelope's face, her hands slapping against her cheeks painfully.

"Hey—!"

"You've already put yourself into one."

All Penelope could see was the jade green darkened by the shadows. Her whispered, monotonous words ringing in her head like a skipping record.

Without a moment's notice, Millie snorted, squishing her sister's sore cheeks until her lips puckered between her palms. "Let's go out tonight, L." She dropped her hands, pulling herself up, back into the warm light of the lamp.

Penelope let out a breath, laughing out the odd feelings swirling inside of her. She should have been used it by then; used to how Millie could leap into the dangerous waters and disappear, only for her to appear a second later, already on the shoreline as she smiled brightly like nothing had happened.

Or maybe, she should have watched closer—maybe then she'd have seen it... that look just beneath the surface. That look of Millie going under permanently. 

End of Part 1

A/N: I LOVE THIS CHAPTER. I already have some edits in mind (mostly wordplay on the shadows and the dim lighting). But its so beautifully chilling i had to post it immediately. And that song paired with it is just amazing.

Thank you for being patient and reading!