The Unlawful Soulmate

Eight ~REALLY sad~

CW/TW: self harming/attempted life taking, self deprication

~ time hop 2 weeks ~

It's been a couple weeks already, I'd mostly been avoiding everyone. But due to my 'good behavior' I've been allowed to go out on my own. Tho I have a tracking bracelet which really annoys me. But whatever.

I was out at the moment, I had to wear a mask cause everyone would recognize me but I didn't care. I was given a card by Tony and was let around to shop. Loki was with me, disguised as another person. We both had trackers but we didn't really care.

"Wanna get some lunch??" Glancing over at Loki he seemed to think it over before nodding. Quickly I started looking at the different stores around, tryna figure out which we both may enjoy. Ahah! I grabbed his hand and lead him over to one of the many stores. Wendy's should do!

Soon enough we were sitting and eating, he still seemed off put by the food here but he seemed to like it. He got a chicken sandwich, I can't remember which. While I got a salad. He seemed happy so I didn't mind. I got a few weird looks for my mask but most didn't comment on it.

Loki seemed to be enjoying his tea, I didn't grab a drink so I mostly just watched the people around us.

"Where do you wish to go next?" Loki smiled, glad to see he was happy. I looked out at the mall and noticed a store with a lot of jewelry and odd clothes. I pointed at it and he nodded, hurrying to finish his food.

I giggled and finished up my salad, taking his trash and putting it where it belonged. He grabbed his tea and we left, heading over to the store.

Both of us got a couple bags of items before heading to a different clothing store. This one I had more fun at, getting entire new outfits so I wouldn't need to wear anything from the others anymore. Along with a new mask, it was a neat black one with chains on it.

I also grabbed a choker with a cat bell. But due to the amount we bought we had to leave. That's when something caught my attention. A black wolf plush and an eight legged horse plush. Immediately I walked over and bought them, happily snuggling as I headed back to Loki who just looked so confused. I shrugged and we left to the parking lot, Happy waiting for us. I thanked him quickly and he seemed surprised, but he smiled. I paused a second and asked what drinks he likes.

He answered and I asked him to wait, quickly running back in and finding where they sold it. I bought a large and quickly headed back out, handing it to him as I hopped in the back. He again was surprised but smiled and started the drive to the tower.

I felt a hand on me and looked over, Loki seemed sickly so I quickly adjusted my temp where he was touching. My arm quickly went numb but he seemed better, soon leaning against my arm and falling asleep.

Soon enough we were back, he woke up and took all the bag. Which honestly ticked me off. I can carry my own stuff thank you very much. He went ahead of me, Happy wanted to thank me. I shrugged it off and headed inside. I decided to make some hot chocolate and went up the the main floor. I don't know where everyone was but I didn't really care. I made my chocolate and started for my room before I heard talking.

Mentally debating I sighed and headed over to the door, leaning towards it to listen.

"We don't even know she's out soulmate! It's been two weeks and we haven't confirmed anything!"

"She's the only one it could be! We need her to be in top shape Steve! Plus haven't you seen her? She needs help, she needs someone!"

"She's a killer and a villain, she's best friends with Loki, one of the worst people in existence. Don't you think that's a bit sketchy!"

"Well... I guess you got me there...."

"See! She's probably plotting to hurt us, she said it herself, she doesn't have any soulmates or any family! We probably have seven petals because it's a unique print! It doesn't mean anything!"

My heart dropped and I sighed. Yeah, kinda figured that. Big reason I didn't show them. They don't want me. I wiped away the tears and headed for my room.

Loki had put the bags on my bed. Thank goodness. I grabbed the stuffed animals and put everything on the floor. For once in this entire stay I laid on the bed. Slowly tears slid down my face and my breathing became harder and harder.

"My apologies miss terr..." Friday called. Her voice seemed soft, almost concerned I'd break. I squeezed my eyes shut and finally just snapped. Tears fully fell, staining my cheeks and making my face hot.

I should just go back to the prison, at least there I wasn't lied to. Anger soon replaced my sadness. Sitting up I grabbed my hair, tears still flowing like a river as my jaw tightened and my teeth started to ache.

That's when a dead calm took over everything. My parents didn't love me, why would my soulmates? My gang abandoned and used me. Everyone has. Why would they be different???

A numbness washed over my being. A smile forming on my lips as I finally just crumbled. I went into the bathroom and grabbed one of the razor blades. Friday spoke but I ignored it, steadying my breathing and giggling as I wrote on my arm, deep red dripping into the sink as my smile grew more and more twisted.

Black dots danced in my vision. That's when I eased up. Tears soon starting to mix with the blood in the sink. I looked up, hot burning anger flaring. I slammed my fist into the mirror, staring at the shattered glass. I pulled my fist away, my knuckles soaked in blood and glass shards sticking from my skin. A giggle bubbled in my throat as I sat on the floor.

The black dots were getting bigger and I was getting tired. But I couldn't stop laughing, everything was just so funny. Of course no one would love me! I'm a freak and a killer. I don't deserve it! I never have, not since I became a reality.

Exhaustion seeped into my body, friday's voice growing increasingly frantic. But I couldn't hear.

I giggled again, closing my eyes. A nap should be okay. Right?

Footsteps nearly made me open my eyes but sleep was calling me. It was so tempting. That's when someone began hitting my face. Annoying.

I opened my eyes, Bruce frantically hitting my cheeks and seeming panicked. He smiled when he saw I was awake and began speaking. But my heart just pounded in my ears. Drowning everything out even as it slowed.

Maybe this time I'll actually die? I hope so. Everything would be easier....

I closed my eyes but this time it wrapped me in a blanket and I was floating in the darkness. It was calming.

I like it here.