Drunk words are sober thoughts

Goodbye mon amour

We're starting out from Levi's POV!

I sighed as I tossed away the bottle. It shattered onto the floor, the alcohol splattering onto the ground. After I realized what I had done to Eren I instantly went to the alcohol, the strongest I could find. Normally I can't get drunk but I've been drinking for so long that I'm suprised I haven't blacked out yet. 'Eren, I wanna see Eren.' 

It's such a simple thought and not a very smart one either but the next thing I know I'm in Eren's cell, door wide open and torch lit.

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I hear a noise and open my eyes, blinking away the sleepiness. "Cap'n?" I say tiredly, having seen his outline when I woke up. He approaches me and I smell something so familiar yet I just can't manage to place my finger on it. I rub my eyes and sit up, now almost fully awake. I now realize what the smell is, "Captian are you drunk?" Alcohol, Hannes and his friends always drank alcohol, I'm shocked I didn't realize it sooner. I focus on his face. "Capitan!?" I exclaim, trying not to be too loud. There's the love of my life, crying, the tears streaming down his face and his usually emotionless, cold eyes filled with regret and sorrow.

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I watch as Eren starts to ask if I'm okay but I'm not listening. 'Say something! Tell him just how much you love him! How he never deserved to be treated like that!' My brain is screaming at me, I can understand what it's telling me, my sorrow having sobered me up a bit but I can't bring myself to say the words. Then, the anger bubbles up in me again, that irrational anger that made me hurt Eren. 'He killed Erwin! He's a monster! He deserves it! There's no one else to blame!' That last one did it for me.

 Me, in my intoxicated state says the last thing I want to come out of my mouth, "I HATE YOU!" Eren, freezes. "I HATE YOU SO MUCH! YOU KILLED ERWIN! YOU MANIPULATED ME INTO CHOOSING THAT BLOND IDIOT AND RUINED MY LIFE! WHAT AM I SUPPOED TO DO NOW!? YOUR A SELFISH MONSTER! YOUR DISGUSTING! JUST SHOOT YOURSELF ALREADY!!" I pause. I open my mouth to say something, anything taking back what I just said. "Eren I-"  He cuts me off. "It's okay Capitan. I understand." He looks at me and smiles sadly, yet so kindly, as if I hadn't just told him to kill himself.

He reaches under his bed to grab something, as he pulls it out, I freeze. A gun. "Eren-" "I knew I was just causing you pain so I snuck this when you weren't looking. I almost killed myself that day but I wanted you to say and see it yourself." He put's it to his head. "Eren I don't mean what I just said!" I yell, having fully sobered up. "Drunk words are sober thoughts Levi." He smiles wider this time, yet still as sad yet kind as before. "I love you." He closes his eyes and put s the gun to his chest. "EREN NO!"

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And that's the end of this chapter! Sorry not sorry for that major cliffhanger!😅 This isn't the last chapter! I have 2 more chapters, maybe three if I feel like it, then the story's over! I hope you enjoyed this short yet emotional chapter!