𝗳𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘁 ✰❤︎ 𝗹𝗼𝘂𝗶𝘀 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗱𝗴𝗲 𝘅 𝗳𝗲𝗺 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿

| 19 |

Chapter Nineteen

~

I hate my life.
I hate every bit of it.
From the second I kissed Finn, until now, three days later, I've done nothing.

I've waken up, eaten, and spent the rest of the day in bed on my phone.

I feel like I've lost my best friend. My first friend. And someone I've loved forever.

I mean all the memories of me and him hanging out, they're just done?

Because that's exactly what it feels like.

I turned off my alarm a few days ago because I didn't wanna start the day. I wanna stay here. In the warmth of my bed. Alone.
I don't wanna wake up and look at anyone.
I don't wanna wake up and celebrate Christmas.

Hell I don't wanna get up to pee.

And that's saying something considering the microscopic bladder I have.

But like always (and I mean always), there's a gentle knock on my door, and it opens shortly after.
"Knock knock knock..." a soft tone and gentle eyes meet with me as I'm curled up in my bed.

"Mmmm," I mumble in whining response.

I can hear her sigh as she walks up from behind me.
"Y/n you gotta start getting up earlier. It's noon and you haven't left the bed yet. Is there something going on? Like did something happen or..."

The bed sinks down a little when she sits beside me and a hand pats my shoulder.
I bite onto my tongue and shoot up from under the warm sheets.

"I hate myself," I fret with worried eyes as I look back up at her, but simultaneously grab a pillow and shove it into my face.

"Woah woah woah don't say that," she shakes her head with furrowed brows, "what happened? Why do you 'hate' yourself."

I grumble into my pillow for a moment, my face burning up at what I was about to tell her.
"Finn and I kissed on the 19th," I say super quickly and smash the pillow even harder onto my face.

Instantly I feel her hand drop from my shoulder.
"W-What? I'm sorry you mean Finn as in like-"

"I didn't expect it! I knew he was acting weird but he just randomly kissed me and I was so taken my shock that I didn't know how to react and I-"

"But he's like a brother to you!"

"Maya!" I remove my face from the pillow and look at me dead in the eyes, "You're not helping!"

"Sorry sorry..." she pauses and looks down for a moment.

"Well is he a good kisser?"

"Maya!" I yell ten times louder and smack her face with my pillow.
"I'm seriously freaking out right now and this is how you respond? Are you kidding?"

"I'm sorry I just- I didn't know he liked you..." she chuckles a little and shrugs.

I swear I'm dying inside. Like literally. My stomach hurts so bad and the more I talk about it, the more a small ache in my head grows.