Summer of Change

Reason to Live

Reason to Live

He could hardly believe it, even as he was preparing to leave the plane. After three years on the battlefield he was finally coming home. Three years away from his beautiful wife who had been six months pregnant when he had left. He had not gotten to be there when his daughter was born, but he would get to be there now. As he left the plane and entered the airport, the sheer number of people disoriented him.

The sudden rush of people shuffling around, the noise, all of the visual stimuli threw him back into the field. He was no longer in a civilian airport, but surrounded by the sounds of explosions and the smell of gunpowder and smoke. The soldiers that were near him were shouting something he could barely understand. His hands tightened on the grip of his rifle and he started to run. The screams and shouts grew louder and he could see out of the corner of his eyes his comrades, his friends falling. As he ran, his vision began to blur. Suddenly, an enemy stood before him with his knife poised to come down on him. He rose his rifle to block the attack, but then everything changed.

He was back in the airport. People all around were staring at him with looks mixed of shock, horror, and even anger. There was a gentle pair of hands on his wrists trying to pull them down. He blinked the visions of the battlefield out of his mind to find two beautiful brown eyes. They were begging for him to recognize who was holding him.

"Kuzon! Kuzon it's okay!" a woman was saying.

Kuzon shook his head for a moment and then stared into the eyes of his wife. Next to her was a small child holding onto her leg that he knew must be his Ty Lee. He was home. He was safe. He wrapped his arms around his wife and held her as tightly as he could.

"I'm home, Huian."

"Oh, Kuzon," she smiled as she returned his embrace. "Welcome home."

"And who is this beautiful little angel?" he asked as he bent down to see his daughter. Ty Lee hugged her mother's leg tighter as Kuzon held his arms out to her. "Ty Lee? What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, dear," Huian said as she stroked Ty Lee's hair. "She just doesn't know you yet is all."

The first few weeks were the hardest. Adjusting to civilian life was nearly impossible. Nightmare after nightmare came, and not all of them came to him during the night. He had found himself in many similar situations as his first day back, each one just as bad, if not worse, than the last. After some pleading from Huian to see a doctor, Kuzon learned that he was suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. As if that news was not bad enough, he then learned that his nighttime cries and screams had been frightening his daughter.

Ty Lee would avoid him whenever her mother was not around. Sometimes he would catch her watching him from the corner of his eye and it gave him hope, but she would still run and hide if he tried to hold her. Huian had told him she was just being shy, but he was beginning to fear she would always be wary of him. Days turned to weeks. Weeks to months. Then it happened.

It was so sudden. No one could explain how it had happened or why. She just collapsed. Seeing Huian lying there in that hospital bed tore at his very soul. The doctors did what they could, but in the end . . .

"So sudden." "Tried everything." "Nothing we could do." "I'm sorry." These were the words that they had given him. Empty, meaningless words when his beloved wife and friend had left him. He sat at her bedside holding her hand tightly as Ty Lee just stared into her face. Kuzon was not sure if she even understood what was going on. How was he going to be able to look after her on his own? He had only had her back for a few months. How was he going to be able to go on without Huian? He fought back the tears, determined to be strong for his daughter's sake. Then an amazing thing happened. One of the most treasured experiences of his life. Ty Lee's hands found his face and cupped his cheeks.