𝙻𝚊𝚍𝚢 𝚘𝚏 𝙳𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚑

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╔ ╗
𝚉𝙰𝚁𝙴𝙻𝙸 𝚁𝙷𝚈𝚂 𝙹𝙾𝙷𝙽𝚂𝙾𝙽
𝟿:𝟸𝟷 𝙰𝙼
𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙼𝙾𝚁𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙰𝙵𝚃𝙴𝚁
╚ ╝

       I walked through the halls of my highschool to get to my next class. I thought about the night before and smirked remembering the satisfaction I felt.

My friend Amara came up to me trying to study my face, "You must've got you some penis last night," she squinted at me.

"No, Gods child Amara" I responded.

If she knew what I really did she would run away from me. We've been friends since the sixth grade, ever since we've met you could never see one without the other.

We were inseparable.

I still didn't tell her about what I did though, just because I know fear can trample loyalty if you have enough of it.

She knew I had secrets, she never bothered asking though. I think she just wanted me to be okay, that's why I think I love her.

"Child of God my ass, you could be freaking like everybody else. I don't know what you do on the weekends but I know it's far from holy," she continued as we made our way into the class we shared together.

I rolled my eyes at her while the teacher passed around work.

| 𝙻𝚄𝙽𝙲𝙷 |

Me and Amara walked into the lunchroom and found a seat at our usual table, we already knew the cafeteria food wasn't going to fill us up or please our tastebuds.

I pulled out my headphones and plugged them in turning to Immortal by J Cole before putting my playlist on shuffle.

Before I put the earbuds in I heard the cafeteria get quiet, I looked up at the people to see what caused it.

There was a boy standing at the entrance mugging the people looking at him, we looked at eachother until I returned the mug and he looked at the next person.

I plugged my headphones in leaning on Amara as the cafeteria started to whisper bout his looks and build.

He's a new student, it's expected.

I felt the bench across from us shake and looked up to see he had sat there. He too had his headphones in not looking for a conversation.

Since there was no one else at this table I think he thought it would be safe, and it would have been if Amara wasn't so adamant on making us more friends.

I think she got tired of it being just us all the time.

I still hadn't took my headphones out but I could see her tap him. I put my head down on the table instead knowing she was going to want to talk and laugh.

God they love to serve a nigga three hots and a cot
Nowadays crime pays like a part time job
And the drought got me prayin' for a car time vibe
Summer Rain come again, numb the pain 'cause it's hard for a felon
In my mind I been cryin', know it's wrong but I'm sellin'
Eyes wellin' up with tears, thinkin' 'bout my niggas dead in the dirt
Immortalized on this shirt

The music played and just when the beat was about to drop someone tapped me.

I looked to my right mugging Amara but she pointed to the boy and I mugged him taking my headphones out completely.

We stared at eachother in silence before he said something, "I asked her for your name and she said ask you."

"That wasn't you asking," I responded.

He squinted his eyes at me. "What's yo name."

I thought about telling him a fake name cause I really don't know him.

"Zareli, what's yo name," he nodded his head before going back to his phone.

One thing I really hated was a rude ass person, if I asked you a question I would expect a response.

"I asked you for yo name sir."

"I heard you" he looked up at me again.

"So tell me yo name.. Unless you a junior, keep that shit to yoself." I spoke and he chuckled.

"I'm not a junior, it's Mehki"

"Mehki what," I continued.

"Ian even ask you all that now."

"Ok but I want to know."

"No."

And for most people they would've left it alone but me? Me, I don't know what that word means. It sounded like I wasn't getting what I wanted but I wanted to make sure.

"No, what does that mean? Whats your last name," I questioned.

He didn't answer, instead he stared at me before looking back down at his phone. I rolled my eyes before putting my headphones back in and starting Immortal by J Cole over again.

The closer the end of the school day came, the more grateful I became.

I wasn't tired but I wanted to be alone at this point, it's always been something I craved after taking a life or granting someone peace.

I wanted to start the process of thinking about what I had done and determining whether I was doing good work.. Or if I was just another evil person put on this earth.

In the end it wouldn't matter, I never found it in myself to care. I just wanted to relieve myself of the anger I felt over and over again.

Killing seemed to do the job, until the anger came back and then it was rinse and repeat.

✍︎︎

Thoughts on Mehki?
Thoughts on Zareli?

alright bye then 🩰