Addicted

13

For the first time in a while, Will's house was cold, and he couldn't put a finger on why. The sunlight still streamed through the windows and waterfalled down the stairs, and the walls were still covered in photographs and doodles. Nothing had changed since Nico left, so what was this uncomfortable sensation? Loneliness? Confusion? Something tugged at Will's gut, and for the millionth time, he played Nico's words back to him.

"...'cause, you know, I've been in love with you for a while..."

Will's hands were shaking. Nobody had ever been in love with him before. Love? Did he even know what that was? Did Nico even know? And if he did, did he mean to use such a strong word? He fiddled with his phone, sprawled shamelessly across the couch as he contemplated such weird, unnatural feelings. Love. Will was not a romantic. When he pictured love, he didn't picture the way he had looked at Nico as he slept on the stairs. He didn't picture the bubbling in his stomach as Nico piled art supplies in his arms, laughing giddily. He pictured those couples he saw on the street, a little too close, a little too comfortable. One leaning on the others arm and batting their eyelashes. Day after day of trying to impress someone who's probably going to leave anyway.

And there he had it. Nico had left, despite everything. And so what was love, but a disappointment? A heart-wrenching kick to the gut? Someone who steals your breath and then blows it into the wind? There was no point. No point at all.

Nico was fine. He was sure of it. With his feelings off his chest, finally, there was no weight dragging him back to the bar. Nothing keeping him up at night. He was fine.
School was merciless, if he actually tried, so he drifted through classes with no bother for what was actually being taught. For some reason, the grey blanket on his bed and the pinholes in his dorm room walls brought him comfort. Familiarity. It was nice. He didn't think very much about what he said to Will, either. Dwelling would only make him overthink, wonder about what he could have said differently. Either way, he knew Will was done with him now, and that it was time to move on.
Move on? Move on to what? He had no friends, no job prospects, not even a shred of knowledge from class. And he definitely wasn't going to make time for romance. That had cost him enough of his time.

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Short update, I know! But I'm working on a lot of projects right now so hopefully my shorter updates will come more often!