MCYT Oneshots

I Wonder {KarlNap}

Based off the song Wonder by Shawn Mendes

Sapnap wonders what it would be like to be dating Karl 

Sapnap flopped back onto his bed, rubbing his hands back and forth on his face, groaning audibly. He'd gotten back from his visit with Karl two days ago, and he already missed the older boy.

His heart ached, missing the hugs and the affection from Karl. Sure, he got hugs and cuddled with Dream, as the homies do, but there was something about Karl that made him feel as if he was on top of the world. 

Sapnap knew, deep down, why he felt this way. He loved Karl. And it wasn't just platonic love, no, Sapnap knew he wanted something more with the boy. 

But he couldn't have that.

Because Karl didn't love him like that. 

Sapnap reached over to his bedside table, grabbing his phone and airpods off the caramel coloured wood. Putting the airpods in his ears, he pressed play on a certain song, staring up at his ceiling as he splayed out like a starfish atop his queen sized bed. 

I wonder, if I'm being real

The song was one of those that would normally be played on the radio, the kind of song your parents will think is super popular right now, when in reality, the song had been at its peak three months ago. 

It wasn't the type of  music Sapnap normally listened to, but he wasn't normally falling in love with his friends either. 

Do I speak my truth or do I filter how I feel?

Sapnap knows he'd never speak the truth. Even though he knew he didn't have a chance, Sapnap couldn't bare to actually hear the words aloud. 

I wonder, wouldn't it be nice

Not all of the lyrics, but most of them, related to his thoughts of Karl. His hopes, his dreams. 

Sometimes, Sapnap would let himself believe that there is a chance Karl likes him back. 

Not often, but sometimes he lets himself have hope.

To live inside a world that isn't black and white?

Karl was what kept his world from being black and white, Karl was the colour, the bundle of joy, the one thing that knows exactly how to make him feel better. Hell, the boy could make anyone feel better, his happiness was contagious. 

I wonder what it's like to be my friends

Do his friends notice how hopelessly in love he is with Karl? Obviously, Karl is oblivious or he would've said something. Do George or Quackity notice? Dream surely has, they have known each other for so long, nothing can be kept a secret for long. And Sapnap notices Dreams' suggestive tone whenever Karl comes up in their conversations. 

Hope that they don't think I'll forget about them

What would happen if he ever lost contact with Karl? Oh, that'd just be horrible, he'd feel empty inside. Even as just friends, Sapnap couldn't imagine a world without Karl in it. 

I wonder

He lets his mind wander, imagining the scenarios where Karl really does like him back.

I wonder

They'd go on many dates, God, if they got together Sapnap would treat this man like a king. 

The music fades to the back of his mind, thoughts filled with nothing but Karl.

Karl

Karl 

Karl

I wonder what it's like to be loved by you

Would Karl stare at him with the same look he gave Karl. With big, round eyes, filled with adoration and love? Would he give Sapnap gifts on random Tuesdays, 'just because'? 

Sapnap wondered if he'd ever be able to confess to Karl. Probably not, but man it'd be awesome if he could. If he could really show Karl his love.

But for now, Sapnap will just Wonder.