All the Little Secrets

CHAPTER 26. NIGHTLIGHT

Chapter 26. Nightlight

Losing my virginity to Liam was awkward, painful, hilarious at some points, and really emotional all at the same time. I thought a girl's first time was supposed to be magical; so much passion, fireworks, all that - at least that's what it's like in the books and movies.

It was nothing like the books and movies.

The only thing magical about losing my virginity was Liam and his gentleness with me, the way he took care of me, the way he cradled me when it was all over. We fell asleep on the beach in each other's arms.

When I woke the next morning, Liam was on his stomach, sleeping peacefully on his arms. The sun was barely rising over the ocean, and the heat from his body kept me warm underneath our blanket. His back was exposed, and I traced his tattoo with my fingers.

The symbol...

Liam's eyes fluttered open as I cuddled close to him.

"You and Seth have matching symbols," I said quietly, and he nodded.

"Before Ellen... died, she let us get tattoos. She was such a hippy," Liam smiled at her memory. "We were 15, I think? She made us a deal: she'd sign the waiver for us to get tattoos, but we had to get one that reminded us to never forget the things we love most."

"What does yours mean?"

He paused, then said, "Brotherhood. It's a Celtic knot for loyalty to my brother."

I propped up on my elbow. "You'll get him back."

"Maybe," he whispered, then kissed me.

We stayed for a little while longer wrapped around each other before packing up the stuff. Liam didn't let me go as we trekked back up to the mansion. I returned to my bedroom as he shuffled off to his, and as I entered my room, Cage was there in my bed, waiting for me.

It looked as if he didn't sleep. Cage patted the spot on the bed next to him. I shook off the sand from my clothes and climbed in. He sat there looking at me as if he wanted to say something. Instead, he laid down and turned away from me. I listened to his breathing become deeper, knowing he finally fell asleep. That was when I looked at him, and the longer I looked at Cage, the more I wanted to cry.

The flight back to LAX is long, and the charade of me and Cage is exhausting. It's affecting both of us to pretend to be something we're not when the one I'm actually in love with is sitting across from us, studying every moment when we hold hands, when we smile at each other, when we're pretending to be so absorbed in one another to please our audience. I'm relieved when we land, and even more so when Cage gets his own limo to take him home.

Before he goes, Cage pulls me into a hug. He leans into my ear.

"Game on."

I look up at him as he smirks, and I smile. "Game on."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

He then disappears into his limo as it drives off from the airport. Our limo is close behind, and as we pack all of our luggage into the trunk, Liam finds the seat next to me. I place my bag on the seat in the middle of us to hide our hands holding on the ride back.

We arrive back in Malibu in the late evening before our return back to class on Monday. We drop Laney off at her mansion and finally pull into the Winters' driveway. As we all exit the limo, a hand grasps my arm. Parker motions for me to follow him, and I do so, curiously. My brother hasn't really spoken to me since our last fight, and even when we do speak, it's always surface-level.