Glow

Step Three

It wasn't until a few days later that we found out what the new connection of our bonds meant.

'You mean I need you guys as much as you need me now?' I ask, shocked.

'From what the doctor concluded from our experiences it's the pheromones we create that soothe the souls bonds we have.' Namjoon repeats, for the fourth time.

'Alright, let me if I got this straight...' I hold up a hand, asking for them to hold off on trying to explain it again. 'I infected you guys with my genetic code at the concert, which made you dependent on my pheromones. Something about your serotonin or dopamine is the factor which changed in you, making you need me to induce it for you with my pheromones, and now that we have bonded I have the same dependency on you...?' I internally admit the uptone in the last few words of my question quaver with emotional shock, but I can only hope they didn't notice.

'It's not an infection Y/N. You know this, we went over this before.' Namjoon holds my gaze, his everything serious about this. 'This isn't something that can be medicated for. A genetic rewrite, intentional or not, is what happened, and now you're included. There's no changing this, medical science has barely started mapping the human genome, figuring out cloning. It's still decades away from figuring out exactly what this change actually does, and what it changes... if ever.'

I'm suddenly very glad I am sitting down. I feel faint. 

Abruptly I shoot to my feet, bowing as low as I can go. 'I am very sorry this happened. I can't express how much I wish I could fix this for you.' 

The chuckling around me was not the response I expected.

'Y/N, we don't blame you.' I lift my head a bit, looking Hoseok's way. 'We know you didn't intend for this to happen, you've tried to find other ways for us to have to go without you, without success, but your intent was honest.'

'We just need to make sure you get your daily dose of us now as well.' Taehyung adds in, nodding while grinning.

I collapse into my seat, my breath rushing out of me as I work my mind around what this means.

'I'm with you guys forever now... huh.' I say, still shocked.

'Yeah, that about sums it up.' Jungkook grins at me, nodding his head.

'But what about when you guys go back on tour?' I ask.

'Like before, we take you with us. There's no other option.' Yoongi states baldly.

'And what about your families? I know you guys go and see your parents and siblings when you have time off... and there isn't a national quarantine going on.' I ask.

'We'll schedule it so that either the families come visit us, the visits are day trips, or we travel together no matter what.' Jin says, patting my knee. I look over at him, my mind whirring.

'Umm.., and what about your own families?' I ask, an eyebrow cocked. With the head tilts around the seating space I gulp hard to push the emotions down and clarify. 'You've all said you wanted to date, get married, have kids. What will your wives think of me? Of us? Of this?'

Shock spreads across their faces like a stadium wave, and they all glance at each other, considering.

'None of us have ever had anything other than a one night stand here or there since we debuted.' Namjoon admits slowly, thinking through the processes. 'And while some of us have admitted to liking a certain person in the idol industry, I don't think any of us have ever even had conversations with those people outside of public niceties.' Jungkook nods, rubbing the back of his neck, as does Seokjin and Hoseok. 

'I took Roseanne to a cafe once. It was nice, but we didn't click.' Taehyung adds, getting a few shocked looks from the guys.

'Hey, how come I never knew about that! I thought I was your soulmate!' Jimin pouts a Taehyung for his admission.

'You were back in Busan visiting family. I was walking Tannie and we met at the dog park. We didn't even plan it, we just hung out for a few hours.' He shrugs his inability to explain further.

****

'I don't think any of us is going to fall in love with another girl or guy with the soul bond we have.' Namjoon continues after the conversation winds its way back to the main topic. 'I don't know if it's possible to even have something as connected as this with someone not a part of the soul bond.'

'Relationships need trust, and I don't know if I'd trust another guy around you.' Jimin admits, picking at his sweater paws.

'Love is harder to define than lust, which is purely physical, but what we have enforces the option for romantic love.' Namjoon adds in.

'My mom once told me love is trust, patience, and an indefinable connection. Science says it's pheromones that let you know when a genetic code would bring about a stronger next generation... physically speaking.' Yoongi says quietly. 'I think my mom might be wiser than science.'

'I think your mom is wiser as well hyung.' Taehyung adds in grinning broadly, making Yoongi blush. The guys all nod their agreement.

'I'd like to meet your mom one say.' I say. 'Actually I hope I can meet everyone's family one day.'

'It'll happen.' Hoseok says, leaning back and stretching. 'This quarantine can't last forever.'

'Meanwhile, how's your Hangul lessons coming along?' Namjoon asks.