kill me{marauders+regulusblack}

Untitled Part 9

Early April of 1975

James sat in the armchair closest to the fire overturning last years snitch in his hands, watching all the Gryffindors sit around him. He let his eyes watch Lily for a moment, and then he grimaced. Why would he watch Lily? Natasha was sprawled across the floor in front of him with Remus trying to make her understand the characteristics of a grindylow. He should be watching them, his best friend and partner. Lily turned round and smiled at him, he nodded back at her and turned back to his friends. Sirius and Peter were in a detention for tricking Snape with polyjuice potion (Peter made it, Sirius would of destroyed the school) as Lily. It was funny of course.

Nat wasn't paying attention to Remus; instead to James' gaze. She could feel her heart slowly fall in her chest, but tried to think nothing of it. She caught Lily's eye and smiled at her, throwing the ginger off guard. She sat up and faced James who had noticed.

"What was all that about then?"

"Oh for Christ's sake Nat, what?"

"You know." She didn't want to start an argument in front of her friends. "But that's fine. Totally okay." How could she stay out of it? Keep cool? "I'm going for a walk."

"You do that." He watched them walk out of the common room, wishing he was braver. "Don't look at me like that, Rem. Don't want two judgy mates."

"You have one judgy mate. Natasha's your partner, and you're not fully in it. And i get we're teenagers, but she's fragile. Even Sirius can see that. You need to do something."

"What the fuck am I meant to do?"

"The right thing."

Outside the tower, Natasha was pacing up and down. The paintings watched them, and she could feel it. She stuck her fingers up at them and all around her a sea of gasps sounded. She slid down the banister and set towards the grounds.

"No, wait."

She snapped around to see James behind her. She melted inside, but she wouldn't let her guard down yet.

"Now what would you want?"

"To talk to you."

"So talk." They turned as if to carry on walking.

"No. A real talk."

They slowly turned to face him. She already knew what was going to happen. "About what?"

"Just that- maybe-"

"Us?"

"Yeah, exactly that." Gosh, how do you do this? The movies make it look easy, so do books when Remus reads them. "I don't think I'm treating you right. I think something needs to happen. You're not stupid, Nat, I mean surely you know."

"Know?" She slowly started to nod, and then tilted her head. The tears were already in her eyes, she wouldn't let them fall. "Of course I bloody know, I've known the whole time. God, you even sent her letters in that 'Things I would tell the red head' journal when you were at my house. Over Christmas!"

"You knew about that too?"

"James, you idiot, I know everything. I'm the same as the boys! I know you and I know me and I know us." The tears were fighting them now. "Oh God, the things I read."

"Trust you to read it."

"Oh fuck yeah, turn it on me. What a surprise."

"Oh you know what, yes. Yes, I like Lily. Boohoo. You knew that when we got together."

"Except the fact that you said you weren't. So you're a liar, that's even worse." Their fists we're clenched, her fingernails digging in to the point blood was dripping off her hands. "Night, Potter. Hope you choke on your tongue in your sleep."

They stormed off, leaving James standing there. He didn't really know what happened, clarity wasn't a strong point in that conversation.

"OI Nat, does that mean we're over?" He yelled at the figure at the castle door. In response he got a thumbs up. "Okay then, that was better than expected."

In the common room, Sirius and Peter had returned and were sitting with Remus, Mary and Alice. The door swung open and blood dripped on the carpet. A sour-faced Natasha walked straight through without looking at anyone or anything.

"Shit, you don't think she killed Ja-" Sirius started, and then was interrupted by an out-of-breath James. "What happened?"

"I did the right thing." He made eye contact with Remus who nodded. "Mary, you might want to go and check she's okay."

As if on cue, a smashing sound came from above them and then a bang. The whole of the common room looked up.

"Oops, must of left my cat out of the cage." Mary said quickly, and then added to James: " Definitely sounds okay."

Mary ran up the stairs, and opened the dorm room. She gently called to Nat before entering and had no reply.