Enlighten me, my Lady?

Chapter 5 - Shame is an ocean

TWs: internalized homophobia, flashbacks to domestic abuse and lesbophobia, self-harm by scratching oneself while experiencing a panic attack

That day, you're late from your usual library visit, and you only have yourself and your Lady to blame for it.

You pout, lips puckered and arms crossed over your chest as you walk across the main hall's decorative floors, your Lady just behind you with a chuckle rumbling from her throat.

"My dearest, had you told me you wanted to have breakfast with me in the library before my duties, I wouldn't have indulged myself the way I did," Alcina laughs, and you hide your grin against your knuckles when you peer over your shoulder.

"You can't possibly blame your poor Maiden for awful time management, can you now, my Lady?"

You almost trip over the jaunty carpets reaching from the stairs when you get lost in Alcina's teasing smirk, illustrated by the midday sun's shine. The almost factor of the tripping vanishes soon enough, and you yelp and falter, your balance lost for a fraction of a second, and it's all your Lady needs.

You find yourself lifted up to her arms, her eyes wide open with a feral gleam of fright. Her claws unsheathed, she looks like she'd be ready to rip someone to ribbons.

"Uh—" you swallow, fluster dancing on your cheeks, "A-alci? I'm not going to combust if I trip over once?"

Your lady shakes her head, like an animal snapping out of primal instincts, and she frowns.

"I knew that—" she starts, letting you back down when you wiggle in her arms. She kisses your forehead, a soft scoff rumbling from her throat. "I'm afraid I can't help feeling protective of you, my dearest."

"I promise I'll be safe on my own two feet, my Lady," you tease, earning you a light tap onto your lips from Alcina. She looks displeased at first, and you almost worry, until you notice the half-smile on her lips and the humorous eye-roll she gives your way.

"I sincerely hope you keep that vow while I attend to my duties. I'll be in my study if you need me."

Alcina rests her hand against your neck as she speaks, her thumb brushing your jawline. You nod, the corners of your lips rising into a gentle smile, and you lift your hands to squeeze hers. You look at her regal glory, the perfectly painted lips, the softness of her face when she meets your gaze, how she towers over you in the safest way imaginable, like she'd be ready to risk her life for you, and your heart gets filled with adoration so intense you think you could ascend right there.

"I assure you, Alcina..." You mutter, dazed by her beauty.

You intend on keeping your promise, despite the fact that you didn't fear within the walls of your Lady's castle. You couldn't think of a single threat that couldn't be prevented by the close vicinity of the Dimitrescu family.

Deciding on combining breakfast and lunch, you visit the kitchen before settling in a cozy corner of the library. The maids know you quite well by this point, one of the older workers pushing a bowl of sliced apples onto your tray with a demanding look on her face. You grimace.

"I don't like apples, miss Vasile, " you whine.

"And I don't like scurvy. Once you remember what fruits don't kill you, you come to me and we'll talk again."

You glare at Miss Vasile, yet you can't help the waves of tenderness everytime she spares you motherly kindness. She's a strong woman, age has graced her with beauty, lingering in the lines of her face and tranquility you only wish you'd possess at her age. Her tightly braided black hair and the metal framed glasses suit the tidy and strict impression of her actions, and you can see the respect she has around the castle, even with the Dimitrescu sisters, but you also know it's quite far from her true demeanor.