𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐘𝐀𝐑𝐃━︎━︎M. Hill ✓︎

𝐓𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲-𝐍𝐢𝐧𝐞

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE:
FIND YOURSELF

SAGE DIDN'T WANT TO RELIVE what happened to her. She didn't want to explain everything to Steve. She didn't want him to know the damage that HYDRA had truly done to her. In that moment, when the question was asked who she was, Sage didn't know how to answer that. Because if she was being honest with herself, she didn't know who she was. She knew the person that HYDRA had made her to be. But Sage had never truly found herself. All she knew was that she was a girl that had lost everyone in the span of a week, and now she felt so terribly alone.

     "There were four of us." Sage started, focusing on her hands instead of on Steve. "Myself, Roxanne, Malia, and Blake. Blake and Malia were siblings. And yet, Blake never seemed to acknowledge that fact. Beatrix, the woman who was over us, had twisted his mind to the point that making sure he did good by her was more important that doing good by his sister. Beatrix put it in our heads that she had rescued us, that we were safe, when really she was forming us into these perfect little soldiers.

     "Malia was only fourteen." Sage told him and Steve couldn't help close his eyes at this fact. "She was so kind hearted, she was like a little sister to me. She meant the entire world to me. I may have been playing HYDRA's role, but my only goal was to make it so that Malia was safe. I wanted to give her life, a normal one with normal kids, a normal school, I wanted that for her. And that's all I've ever wanted for her. I didn't want Beatrix to twist her mind like she did with Roxanne, Blake, and I.

     "When I was assigned to kill Maria, I made myself a new name, I got close with her, and Maria I managed to run into each other on another mission. I saved her life. And she saved my." Sage clenched her jaw. "We made a plan to destroy that HYDRA building, to get Malia out. And we were so close, we were. Until I was shot by Blake. He was standing there with Beatrix, with no emotion in his eyes. He didn't care that I was going to bleed out right there. Malia was angry. Because I was family to her. And even if it was her own brother, she wasn't going to let the person who shot me get away." A tear slipped down Sage's cheek as she finally met Steve's eyes.

     "She took my gun, and even though I told her to run, she wouldn't listen to me." Sage shook her head. "Blake shot her in the head. Her own brother killed her right before my eyes. He was going to kill me next. And honestly, I wanted him to. I didn't want to live in a world where I had failed the one person I wanted to save. I heard the gun go off, but no impact. I opened my eyes and there Maria and Roxanne stood, having shot both Blake and Beatrix." Sage wiped her tears away. "Maria saved my life. I owe her everything."

     Sage paused for a few moments, pursing her lips as she looked at Steve. She cocked her head to the side. "You asked me who I am. And I'm going to be honest with you, Steve, I don't know. I don't know who I am. I know who HYDRA wanted me to be. I've never had the chance to explore myself. You don't have to trust me, I'm not asking you to. But I want you to know that I will never work with HYDRA again. I want all of those bastards dead for what happened to Malia. They took her from me, and this is all I have left of her." She showed Steve the necklace that was placed around her neck. "Everything else was destroyed with the HYDRA base."

     "I'm sorry you had to go through all of that." Steve told her. Listening to Sage tell her story, Steve's heart seemed to break for the woman. He knew what it was like to lose people you love. His sister popped up in his mind, Evelyn Rogers laughing at something Bucky had said. He missed her dearly. "I know what it's like. To lose everyone you love. When I went in ice, I was leaving behind my sister, and her voice was the last thing I heard. She knew I wasn't coming home, and I think that made it worse."

     Sage managed a sad smile. "I didn't know you had a sister."

     "Not a lot of people do." Steve admitted. "They see me more than her. But she's the reason I am who I am. And I wish she were here to see the person that I've become. And that's why I know who you are Sage. You're someone that will do anything for those she loves, and that's something I admire. Maria was right to trust you. Everything you went through wasn't your fault. Malia wasn't your fault. You were doing what you thought was right, and if I were in your shoes, I probably would've done the same thing."

     Sage let the tears fill her eyes as she placed a gentle smile on her face. "So, what does this mean. I mean, what do you want me to do?"

     Steve offered her a small smile. "I want you to find yourself first. And then, we can talk about you being part of the Avengers."

     "Part of the Avengers?" Sage wasn't expecting that.

     "I trust you, Sage." Steve told her. "And I want the others to have the chance to hear your story and trust you as well. But all on your own terms. You're free here. You're allowed to have a chance to breathe and get to know yourself. Just come and talk to me again when you're ready to start you're training." Steve stood up and walked out of the room, and Sage couldn't help the wide smile that started spreading on her lips.