to the moon & to saturn | cate blanchett

chapter 15

After Cate left, Elle's exhaustion set in and she drifted right into a deep sleep.

She had a dream that she and Cate were back at the amusement park, sharing a cup of ice cream and a bag of mini donuts. Just as Cate whispered to Elle that she wasn't wearing any underwear, the young girl was rudely awoken by an incessant pounding on her front door.

"Ellen, I know you're in there. Let me in!"

Her mother's voice, distinctive and firm, pierced through the cracks in the doorframe.

Fuck. Dylan's parents actually called her?

Elle stayed in bed and put a pillow over her head. Maybe this was a nightmare.

"Wake up, wake up, wake up," she muttered to herself, bashing the pillow on her head repeatedly.

Bashing her head in seemed like an attractive choice over facing her mom.

"Ellen Marie, open this door or so help me —"

"Yeah, yeah!" she screamed, rolling out of bed.

She threw on a fresh pair of underwear, a sports bra, and a robe to cover herself. Spotting her wet panties on the ground, she chucked them into the laundry basket in her closet before heading to the door.

Her mother didn't need any more reasons to be disappointed in her.

Elle let her mother into her apartment for the sole purpose of not causing a scene in the hallway that would inevitably disturb the neighbors.

Her mom looked different from the last time she saw her in-person, which made complete sense given the three year absence. Her hair was slightly graying at the roots; a few silver strands poked through her blatantly dyed auburn hair. There were more wrinkles around her eyes. She got a new pair of glasses, a tortoise shell pattern, and they were hanging on a silver chain around her neck.

Other than the natural signs of aging, she seemed the same. Her expression was stoic, unwavering, and hard to read. There were no signs of love, no sign that she cared about Elle. No questions about college, her life, her friends, or her wellbeing.

She looked Elle up and down with pursed lips, then gazed briefly around the apartment.

"This is certainly cozy," she said, frowning.

Elle crossed her arms. "That's all you have to say?"

She sounded bitter. She was bitter. She didn't want her mom to be in her apartment. Especially if she was going to critique everything.

She pulled her robe tighter around her body, leading Mary to ask, "Did I wake you up? At one in the afternoon? Seriously, Ellen, are you this lazy?"

Elle rolled her eyes in distaste for her mother's habit of jumping to her own misled conclusions.

"We need to talk," continued Mary, as Elle didn't indicate in any way that she was going to respond.

Elle didn't offer her mother a seat in the living room, and her mother seemed so uncomfortable that Elle doubted she'd take the offer even if she asked.

"This won't take long," said her mother. She examined her nails, which were freshly manicured, and wiped her hands on the back of her jeans. "I'll cut straight to the point. Dylan's parents told me about your new girlfriend and I'm here to tell you to stop seeing her."

"No," said Elle. "Well, thanks for stopping by. You can leave the same way you came in."

Her mother looked shocked that Elle was disobeying her, although Elle didn't understand why. What did her mother think? That she would drop the love of her life just because her supposed parental figure told her to? Damn, she must be delusional.