Give Me Love

chapter thirteen

He regretted letting you leave with each step you took further away from him. The way you were hunched forward slightly, dragging your steps, slowly following Sabè... you were still sick and you needed his help. His protection. Him.

Someone was out to get you, and against all better judgement, he had let you go. Even when the force around him literally felt like it was screaming at him to run after you, he couldn't make his feet move. And he knew exactly why.

"You're at my service, so I get to decide."
You were exactly right, and he was the one who had gotten it switched around. The Council tasked him with watching over you— not controlling you. So when you said you wanted to go off with Sabè, who was he to stop you?

The fact that you had stood up for yourself in front of him like that was honestly... admirable. No matter how bad this thought was, he didn't think you were capable of coming out of your shell like that to him. You were always so timid around people who were angry, especially when that anger was directed at you. He was proud of you, in a weird sort of way, and satisfied that you felt comfortable enough around him to express yourself like that.

He wished he could tell you that. Especially after you had turned to him with so much guilt in your eyes.

"I'm sorry."

There's nothing to be sorry for, Y/n.

There was not an ounce of blood in his veins that had actually been mad at you. Just annoyed. If he had his way, he'd have carried you over his shoulder and plopped you on the bed and sat in his chair as you and Sabè talked it out. He'd pretend not to listen but he really would. But you'd be right under his supervision, warm and safe and within arms reach in bed. He wouldn't have to be worrying so damn hard right now.

But you wanted your privacy, you'd made that much clear. And with something that had broken your heart so deeply... he couldn't hold the kind of closure Sabè was offering away from you by being there and messing it up.

So he'd let you go.

And now he was pacing the halls of the Jedi Temple, at war with himself. You shouldn't have let her go. You made the right decision by letting her go. Anything could happen while she's out there. You trust her enough to come back safe. What if something happens?

Nothing was going to happen, and there was no use in overthinking like this. Where had all these years of Jedi training gotten him? He knew better than to let his fears get in the way of his judgement.

As he neared the temple medbay, he heard the ruckus of a commotion up ahead. Another Jedi and their squad must have returned and was having injured soldiers brought in to be patched up, and Anakin curiously ventured toward the medbay to find out who had come back.

Maybe it was Kit. He was due to arrive from his siege on Limpho-II any day now.

As he drew nearer, he realized the commotion was not due to a returning Jedi, but, in fact, a couple of civilians. He could tell by the ambulance docked at the double doors, the lights now off but the workers were quickly working to pack it back up and take off again.

Anakin was just about to turn around and walk away again when he caught sight of a familiar lekku.

"Ahsoka?" He jogged up to meet her in the waiting room. His steps faltered when he saw Obi-Wan, too.

"Anakin, where were you?!" His Padawan reeled on him, furious, before he even got the chance to come to a stop.

"What do you mean? I was here."

"Why weren't you with her?"

"Who?"

"You know who! Y/n."