It was mid june and you spend your summer holidays at Hogwarts. There aren't many students here at this time, so you were alone all the time. Even during the year you're alone, and everybody ignores you. Your mental health went worse and no one noticed besides Professor Snape. After a detention you started to talk to him more because you knew that he isn't a bad man, and it turns out that he's a thoughtful and smart man with history. You told him things about you, you've never shared with anyone before and so did he. During the holidays it became a habit that you visit him every evening. It was 8 p.m and you were on your way to his chambers. You knocked on the door.
,,Come in." said a deep but gentle voice. When you walked into the room, you saw him at his desk writing something. You sat down on his couch, breathing hard.
,,How was your day?" he asked while he looked at you concerned.
,,It was okay, could have been better. I read a bit and spend the day in bed. Like everyday. What about you?"
,,I worked the whole day. Is everything okay?"
,,Yeah, of course why are you asking?" he knew something was wrong and you knew you shouldn't lying, or hiding the truth in other words.
,,You are out of breath and you look pale. Besides I know it when you're hiding something from me." He stood up from his desk and sat down at the armchair beside you.
,,I didn't ate the whole day because I couldn't. I just couldn't. Same as yesterday."
,,And?"
How does he know I'm still hiding something? It's so embarrassing.
,,There isn't more." He looked at you and took your hands into his.
,,Y/n we both know you're not telling the truth. I can't help you if you're not honest with me." Tears filled your eyes. He was the only person you had and you're lying again. It's the same everytime and that's because you lost all of your friends. He stood up and took a seat next to you on the couch.
,,I am so sorry Severus." you cried and put your head on his shoulder.
,,It's okay y/n. Now tell me what's wrong. Everything will be okay, I'll help you." he put an arm around you to calm you down. You loved his smell and his warmth.
,,I harmed myself again." you said and roll up the sleeve of the sweater you were wearing. He looked at you and wiped the tears away with his thumb.
,,You're the strongest person I know y/n and you try your hardest every day. You came to me instead of isolating yourself again." He kissed your forehead.
,,It's so hard Severus. I can't do this anymore. I just can't" you sobbed while you put your head in his chest.
,,Look at me dear." And so you did.
,,You can. You're a fighter and I'll help you the best I can. I think it would be the best if you're staying here with me."
,,I'm just a burden to you."
,,Don't you dare to say something like this again. You are not a burden. I like spending time with you and all I want is to make you feel good. I want to see you smile again." he said gently and stroked your cheek softly.
,,I don't deserve this."
,,You deserve the world my dear."
,,I don't know what to say. I don't even know how you could help me."
,,Did you drank anything today?"
,,A glass of water or two I think."
,, Alright then let's start with that." and without any word, a glass of water were in his hand. He gave it to you and your drank it.
,,Your wandless magic is impressive."
,, Isn't it?" he smirked.
,,Now I think I prepare my bed for you. I'll sleep on the couch." He stood up and before he could walk away your grabbed his wrist with all your strength, which wasn't much because you didn't ate anything the last two days.
,,You don't need to. Can you sleep with me in your bed?"
,,If you want that, of course. Anything you wish." you let his wrist go and tried to stand up but you only could see black and your legs become shaky. You felt his hands around your body and he sat you down.
,,Is everything okay y/n?" he asked after a minute.
,,I think it cost my last strength to came here. I'm so weak right now."
,,I see. I'll carry you." he put his arm under your legs and carried you in bride style to his large bed.
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He took of your shoes and then he layed down next to you.
,,Severus?"
,,Yes my dear?"
,,C-can you please hug me?" And then he put his hand around your waist and hugged you tight from behind. It was so comforting and you felt so safe.
,,Thank you for everything."
,,There is so need to thank me."
,,If you say so. I didn't asked you how you are."
,,I'm okay. Same as usual."
,,What is usual for you? Working the while day even in the holidays?"
,, Probably. But now I spend my days with you dear." he whispered and you felt his breath on your neck. You turned around and you layed so close to him that his nose touched yours.
,,Why are you so kind to me?"
,,I like you y/n and it breaks my heart to see you such in a bad shape. You are so beautiful and you don't deserve any of this." he whispered.
,,I feel so safe when I'm with you. Thank you for everything you did. Don't say there is so need to thank you, there is." And then before you could think about it you kissed him. It was a passionate and deep kiss. You were on top of him and his left and grabbed your neck gently and his right hand touched your waist.
,,You make me want to live again." you layed on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. His hand moved through your hair.
