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Death was always such a funny thing to talk about. Especially when in the survey corps. You always faced death no matter what. I had faced death many times , and once again death was right in my face. This time however was different. There was no way I could escape it. It loomed over like the clouds on a cloudy day.
So why did it have to happen? There were so many things I wanted to do. Look over the blue ocean, come back home with my friends, my family. I wanted to start a family with Hange. I smiled, Hange the love of my life, my other half, the one that put this ring on my finger, the one that loved me, the one I promised to love forever. All these things were going to be taken away.
I watched death come even closer, I could laugh why, was it so slow. I watched as the blast of a titans transformation came closer, I felt the heat on my skin. This one thing was going to end so many lives, and what about Hange. Is Hange safe? Will they be okay?
Tears fell from my eyes. Death was something everyone knew was going to happen, but when it did it was terrifying. When you do want it to come it grips you and pulls your fear forward. The hot flames and debris tore at my skin as I was flung back by the force. I closed my eyes and pain spread throughout my body.
"Hange" I whispered, feeling all the light leave. I didn't feel anything. It was black and dark. I was gone.
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Hange looked over the destroyed city, their eye throbbing lightly. Their thoughts went to you. Oh how they loved you, the thought of coming home with you starting a family made their heart flutter. They walked over to the small group of people.
"Has anyone seen Y/N?" They asked, playing with the ring on their finger.
They all looked at each other, "They haven't been seen since the explosion" Jean said looking around at the group.
Hange's stomach knotted with fear, their palms sweating. They looked back at the city, and started to jog towards where you were supposed to be.
"Hange!"
Hange ignored the group and jumped using their gear to swing over to your position.
"You're okay, you're fine Y/N...please" Hange muttered under their breath. As soon as Hange's feet touched the ground they ran as fast as they could, limping lightly. They rubbed their face angrily.
"No crying, Y/N is fine."
She turned the corner and cried out, "Y/N! Please, it's Hange!"
The buildings were torn, fire still blazed in areas. She couldn't lose everyone they cared about. They already lost, Moblit, and Erwin, they couldn't lose you as well.
"Y/N!!" Hange screamed racing through the streets.
They turned the corner, and stopped a shimmer catching their eye. They ran towards the shimmer, and started to move debri. A familiar hand came into view.
"No, no, no, no" they cried moving the rocks.
Be alive, still be breathing, I want to see your face, Hange thought.
They kept moving the rocks and other things getting closer. Violent cries left Hange, as they saw your face. It had ash, and blood covering it. Hange grabbed under your shoulder and pulled you out the rocks falling to the side.
"Y/N" Hange cried, picking you up, and caressing your cheek. You laid limply in their arms, cold. Hange looked at your state, a large gash on your side leaking blood freely, skin cold.
"Y/N, darling please.." Their heart broke once more, tears falling. They felt your pulse, and found nothing, they brought their head down to your chest hoping for a different result, but again nothing.
"Y/N, please!.." Hange cried, punching your chest "why won't you wake up!" They screamed to the sky. They brought their face into your hair trying to save some part of you, but you smelled mostly of ash.
"Please..I-I can't do this without you." Hange sobbed looking at your peaceful face.
They wondered if you were at peace, if you had been in pain. Hange picked you up, one arm rested on your stomach, and your head rested on their shoulder.
Hange found this unfair, what had they done to deserve this, what had you done to die. Nothing is what. All the two of you ever wanted to do was grow a family in a small house. So how come it could never happen? Why was this world so cruel?
They brought you to the wall, and placed you down not far from where the small group was. Hange held you close your head in the crook of their neck. They cried and screamed out, holding you clawing at your burned clothing.
"If I was with you.." they sobbed looking at the small group, "maybe things would be different."
The light in Hange's eye went out like a flame, they felt empty and the place in their heart was a void.
"If I had been with you, maybe...maybe at least I would be with you"
If only I had been with you...things would have been different.
