Uncle Cas

Oh, you turned your back on yesterday

Oh, you turned your back on yesterday

Castiel sighed and massage the soap across his chest, the water battering pleasantly against his upturned face and running hotly down his body.

It had been a long day at work and he was always grateful to come over to the Winchesters' and their well-pressured shower. He knew there was only so much more he could do here in Lawrence before he would have to take a trip to LA and he wasn't looking forward to it. He was having too much fun with his family.

I should find a way to move my work completely here, he groused but it was an old thought and he knew that he would never do anything about it. He loved his work and he loved the feeling of always being accepted back at the Winchesters. Somehow he was afraid that if he stayed here forever they would grow tired of him.

He and John hadn't talked about what had happened three years ago again, not once, and they had spent very much time alone since then, certainly giving them the opportunity. Castiel was happy that everything had gone back to normal between them and that nothing had changed in the family dynamic but somehow he also sometimes found himself sad at how easily John had managed to let go, again.

Still, this was nothing new. His sadness, John's abrupt endings, this had happened before and Castiel was actually proud to say that he was handling it better this time around. If he was bitter that he had had to handle it again and if he sometimes made it show by dragging home men that looked a little too much like John well, then it was no one else's business but his own.

Besides, he had other things on his mind. Dean, for one. He was very certain that the boy hadn't said anything about what had happened over a year ago and for that Castiel was grateful, but the boy's attitude towards him had definitely changed. It was very subtle and he noticed it only when he and Dean were by themselves. It was small things, like how the boy would lean closer than necessary, brushing their fingers together. How he would look at Castiel. Sometimes, when Castiel lost focus and kind of zoned out, he would be brought back by a piercing set of green eyes peering at him, almost curiously. It was unsettling. Dean hadn't broached the subject of his first masturbation again and Castiel hadn't either, figuring that Dean had realized that it actually was a private affair.

He had, however, once asked if Dean was seeing someone but Dean's reaction had left him baffled. He had just picked up Dean from school and there had been a pretty young blonde who wasn't Dean's friend Jo that had waved him off.

"Getting girlfriends already?" he had teased but Dean had tensed up in the car seat beside him. "Dean?"

"She's no one." Dean had mumbled and sunken deeper down in the seat.

"No?" Castiel had smiled. "She was very pretty though, wouldn't you—"

"What would you know about that?" Dean had spat and Castiel had looked at him, completely dumbstruck. "Don't you just like boys?"

Castiel harrumphed, a little surprised at the question turned statement since they had never actually discussed his sexuality. He supposed the boy was smarter than Castiel gave him credit for.

"Yes," he answered calmly. "I like men Dean."

"Well, there you go then." Dean had sneered and turned to the window, completely ignoring Castiel's surprised expression.

They hadn't talked about that again either. Dean had been his usual self ever since and Castiel had allowed himself to relax again. The boy was growing up after all, coming into his puberty and Castiel remembered how that had been.

Castiel started massaging shampoo in his hair but thought he heard a knock. Lowering the water, he peeked out behind the shower curtain. There it was again.