cornflakes are good

Part Nine

[Three hours later, in DUCK's apartment]

DUCK sighed while staring out of the window dramatically. It had been quite the day, so of course now it was raining. Not a heavy rain, but a rain that would still make your spirits drop. Zenpi had noticed this and was patting DUCK on the head. 

DUCK turned around and looked at Zenpi. "Senpie. . . I want to get married."

"Really?" Zenpi said, his face lighting up. 

"Yes, really," DUCK replied.

Zenpi then pulled a large diamond ring out of his pocket and presented it to DUCK. "Okay. DUCK, will you marry me?"

DUCK was surprised that he actually agreed to this and was able to find a ring so quickly. "Yes! A million times yes!" 

And so Zenpi slid the ring on DUCK's feather finger feather fricking finger thing and kissed him. "We need to send out wedding invitations right away. . . Everyone will be invited!" he said to DUCK. 

"Yes!" DUCK said and smiled.

[Meanwhile at Baka Bell]

Another Child bit into his Baka Bell burrito. "Maybe we should buy a home or something," he said to particularly no one.

"That's probably a good idea," Child responded. She didn't order much: just a Baka Bell soda and French fries. She already finished off her fries and was sipping the last of her soda.

"Where will we get the money though?" Other Child asked her friends.

"We could rob the bank like we did just now to buy the food," Sophia replied while inhaling a Baka Bell taco.

"Oh, yeah," Other Child said.

There was a bank right next to Baka Bell. Sophia pulled on a black ski mask she stole from a shop and ran over to the bank. Robbing the bank was quite easy. She would threaten whoever was working there with a soggy paper towel (those always did the trick) and then take whatever money she needed. So she did just that. She got about a million dollars: probably enough to buy a house for everyone.

So they went house shopping. They settled on an apartment because they didn't need much space anyhow and it was still quite nice. 

Another Child was working on licking the blood off the pillowcases when there was a knock on the door. Just to be sure that it wasn't any of the octopuses, he looked through the peephole. There was no one. He inspected the outside hallway some more. The coast was clear. There weren't going to be any surprise attacks from the octopuses.

"Who's that?" Child asked as Another Child closed the door.

He was holding a white envelope in his hand. It read, "From DUCK and Senpie, a soon-to-be newlywed couple!" Another Child opened up the letter. 

"It's. . . A wedding invitation?" 

"Oh," Child uttered. "Do we know them? Where is it?"

"It's from DUCK and Senpie. . .," Another Child said. He paused to think. "Maybe Sophia would know who they are."

Child and Another Child trotted over to Sophia's room and knocked on the door. No answer. Child looked to Another Child and shrugged. Another Child tried the doorknob. Locked. He then swallowed the door whole and walked into the room to see Sophia in a food coma.

". . .Oh," Child said.

So Child and Another Child did a 180 and walked over to Other Child's room. The door was wide open. Other Child was reading a book that she stole from a kid riding the bus. She noticed them walk inside and closed her book. "What's up," she said casually.

"We're invited to a wedding," Another Child told her.

"Whose wedding?" Other Child asked.

"We don't really know," Child replied. "Apparently it's DUCK and Senpie's. . . Whoever they are."

"Did you ask Sophia?" Other Child asked.

"She's dead," Another Child said.

"She's in a food coma," Child explained to Other Child.

"Hm," Other Child mumbled. "Should we go?"

"We have nothing else to do, so. . . Maybe," Child said.

"Woo, a wedding!" Another Child said.

"Weddings are boring," Other Child said.

"It beats sitting here and doing nothing," Child said to Other Child.

"Maybe," Other Child replied.

So they all went to the clothing store nearby to shop for outfits to wear at the wedding.

the letter

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From DUCK and Senpie, a soon-to-be newlywed couple

You have been invited to our wedding!

Please wear appropriate clothing.

Gifts for the groom and bride would be appreciated.

Takes place at 6PM today at the Namiji Park!

Be there!

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