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*****
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Eleven years to the misery, more than a decade to the void, the oblivion and nothingness. The day a part of her; her mother died. The day she was left with no one but her Nano. The day she became an orphan.
"Let me go to work today." Gathering her stuff together to leave for work, she urged in a low voice knowing too well her grandmother is not going to spare her for the day.
"Are you going to leave your Nano Amma like that, all alone crying for your mother the whole day?" This emotional blackmail was the last thing she wanted to encounter today, but there she was starting off her day with it.
"We're not going to cry Amma. Your daughter is at a better place. My mom and dad are together. I see no reason for you to cry, so stop." Just one look at her weeping grandma and she dropped the idea of leaving her to endure the heaviness of the day on her own.
Coiling an arm around her shoulders she sat down near her, comforting her.
"Malina loved you very much."
"I loved her, too."
"She loved Zayan just like her own son, i remember."
"Of course, she did." She rolled her eyes back at his name habitually.
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"Nobody's ever going to know that you killed yourself, Mama. Nobody, i promise you. You were a survivor and you always will be. You survived through a hell for me, you saved my life and lost yours in the process, you snatched off that demon from me and let him destroy you, you protected me from those ugly scars of my fate and made them sting into your soul, so deep so bad that the poison of my share of scars and traumas took your life away. I will forever hate myself for my vulnerability. I will forever hate myself for not being there for you in your last days. I could've saved you, just the way you saved me.. but I chose to be a frightened child who preferred caging herself from witnessing you in a state that reminded me of-
I love you, Mama. I love you. It hurts, it hurts still, just the way it did years back. I wish dad would've lived longer to protect his family.
Momma and Dad, please come back. This world hasn't been kind to your child. Your Zimal can't bear this pain anymore. Please. Please. I would do anything just to see a tiny bit glimpse of you both, just a moment with you both, just a little hug mama please. Dad, please. I'll die. Please."
