𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐎 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐄 [Discontinued]

𝐌𝐚𝐲 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞?

I arrive home after 5 minutes long walk. The dress that wasn't so heavy at first makes my arms feel sore now. 

I think working out wouldn't harm, but damn where is the time for it? 

 To my surprise mom doesn't even notice I'm home, she is on her phone talking to someone. 

A very calm tone at first turned into a screaming whisper now, she never was able to yell no matter how hard she wanted to. The loudest she got is a bit louder than her normal speaking tone. 

But when the Italian curses fly out of her mouth as if she didn't do anything else, I am considering calling the family of whoever she's talking to and speaking out my condolences.

She rarely uses Italian.  You can see it as if she swore it off, but when she's mad it's a whole other story.

''They are supposed to be Lavender, not violet do you understand me, you better get me the flowers I ordered or you won't see one cent of the payment'' I overhear her curse even more before she hangs up whacking her phone on the couch next to her, and starts cussing out in Italian even more.

Holy Guacamoly that's serious-serious.

I know my mum is the sweetest and nicest, but also the most short-tempered person I know that's nothing new to me, but getting that buzzed up about flowers? That's a whole new level of short tempered-ness. 

But on the same page, it's visible so clear now why she is my biggest inspiration in life. 

 Even if she is a bit crazy sometimes and we could strangle each other, you can see in her eyes how much she wants everything to be perfect, she has planned Each so smallest detail that anyone else would probably forget about. 

I mean, who else would demand the flowers to be lavender and not purple?... Isn't that the same though? 

Ah, you know what I am not getting deeper into that.

 What I  want to say is that she is the most disciplined person I know. 

 I admire it about her, she has the strongest will when it comes to things she wants. She will stay up day and night if she has to but in the end, she will prove to anyone that SHE did it.

 Even after her marriage to my father she never gave up even though she would have every right to.

You have to know my mother and my father divorced when I was about 16, it was a horrible specimen of my life.

My dad was an alcoholic, he used to come home drunk every night. And the so smallest thing was enough for him to explode and start beating my mum because of his senseless anger.

My mom is an angel a wicked one, but an angel. She never, not even once dared to fight back. She let everything happen, no matter if it was a broken nose or rib she let him get his anger out.

So many times she took his wrath upon herself so he wouldn't do anything to me. 

He is the main reason why I want to be a lawyer so much. So I'll never have to feel so helpless ever again. 

So no woman ever has to feel like my mother did.

He wasn't always like that, I think that's what quiet hurts most about. And deep down I know this is the reason my mum stayed with him for so long, she had hoped for the man she loved so dearly to come back. I know it because I did too. 

When he went batshit crazy, I didn't just lose my father no I lost my first ever friend, I lost my best friend.

Everything started to go downhill when his company started to lose more money than it was worth. He couldn't stop it anymore though, he was buried in debts and instead of calling bankrupt, he drowned his sorrows in alcohol, and well everything came how it came.